


Off The Edge

by commanderspectre



Category: Mass Effect
Genre: F/M, Mass Effect 3, Multi
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2015-12-07
Updated: 2016-02-08
Packaged: 2018-05-05 10:14:00
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 26
Words: 27,573
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5371523
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/commanderspectre/pseuds/commanderspectre
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Commander Sarah Shepard. Alliance Navy. First Human Spectre. Following the Alpha Relay incident, she surrenders herself into Alliance custody and is appointed a guard in case of Batarian retaliation. Lieutenant James Vega. She's basically a sarcastic pain in his ass. The attraction is immediate, but she has ghosts. Then the galaxy starts circling the drain and they have to stop it.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> I don't own anything Mass Effect. Bioware does. I just mess with it a bit.

James sighed as he stared down at the security screen, currently bored out of his mind. He thought that when he accepted the position of Commander Shepard's guard, it might have been a bit exciting. After all, there were continual threats on her life by the Batarians after the Alpha Relay incident but so far, it seemed like it was all bluster on the part of the Hegemony.

His ward was currently laying on her bed, her data pad raised above her as she read one of the books that had been downloaded onto it. They had disconnected it from the extranet, as well as taken away her omni-tool. That one had caused a bit of a fuss, apparently it had been expensive when she had gotten it on Omega and was extensively modified.

After a while, she set the pad down next to her on the covers and stretched, her arms above her head and her back arching off the bed as sounds bordering on erotic left her lips. He heard one of the other guards at the security station clear his throat nervously and he looked over to see him shifting in his seat. James snorted in amusement as he looked back at the screen, watching as she settled again, her hands on her stomach.

The Lieutenant would be one of the first to admit it: Commander Shepard was hot. Long honey blonde hair, dusky skin, piercing green eyes, and a curvy yet firm physique. If she were an Alliance pin up model, she'd make a fortune. Instead she was the Hero of the Citadel, Conqueror of the Collectors (or so the news networks had so romantically called her) and First Human Spectre.

Soldiers everywhere followed her career since she survived the Thresher Maw attack on Akuze that had wiped out her entire unit, the networks painting her as the Lone Survivor, defeating impossible odds to stay alive even as everyone around her died. It was very inspiring. After the fight at the Citadel against the rogue former Spectre Saren Arterius, she was held up as a paragon of humanity.

There was a galaxy wide moment of silence when she was declared KIA after the destruction of the SR-1 Normandy. Testimony from the surviving pilot stated that he saw her get pulled into the void of space even as she made sure his escape pod launched, thinking of his safety rather than her own. It had been obvious to everyone who had seen the testimony that the pilot felt extreme guilt over her death, as he had refused to abandon ship with the rest of the crew, forcing her to get him herself and causing a delay in their own escape.

News crews had been there as the remaining crew of the Normandy stood at her memorial service, some military, some civilians, even a few aliens. Despite an extensive search of Alchera and the wreckage of the Normandy, no remains had been found to bury.

Then Staff Lieutenant Kaidan Alenko spoke at the service, talking about the Commander's bravery in the face of incredible danger, how she had pulled all these different people together to stop a threat to the entire galaxy. It had been clear from the way his voice broke with emotion from time to time that he had cared for her more than one would care for his Commanding Officer.

A Turian former C-Sec agent, an Asari archeologist, and even a Quarian had spoken as well, the last two needing to be helped off the stage as emotion got the better of them. The service ended with a showing of a vid, recorded sometime before the fight on the Citadel. It had been surprisingly candid, the Commander smiling and laughing, poking fun at the Turian who returned the jabs with a dry sarcasm, commenting on her Mako driving skills, or lack thereof. She had gathered the crew around her for what resembled a family photo, and they all looked happy as they crowded around her while the exploration droid took the shot.

Two years after the service, rumors started circulating about an SR-2 frigate named the Normandy travelling the Terminus Systems, but flying under the recognizable colors of Cerberus. That's when stories of a woman matching Shepard's description started running rampant through the ranks. None of them believed it at first, that Shepard was alive and working with Cerberus against the Collectors as whole colonies of humans went dark.

James had been on the Citadel when the Normandy docked, the black, yellow, and white ship catching quite a bit of attention. He had watched her come through the airlock with two others in Cerberus uniforms, and she had even looked right at him, but her eyes slid past without a second glance. It had been brief, no more than a second, but it had confirmed it in his mind.

Commander Sarah Jane Shepard was alive.

 


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I don't own Mass Effect. Bioware does. I just mess with it a bit.

Shortly after his chance run in with Shepard, Fehl Prime happened, something he still didn't like to talk about, and he became determined to waste away on Omega in dive bars. Anderson had had to pull him out of a bar fight when James destroyed a vid screen following the Alpha Relay incident, the reporter painting Shepard as a terrorist and a monster. He'd have that scar from taking a chair across the face for the rest of his life. Damn Batarians.

Here he was, sitting in a security control room, bored out of his skull. He watched as she laid there for a minute before getting up, going over to the window overlooking the planet they were on before she was due to be shipped back to Alliance Command in Vancouver.

"Amigos, I'm going for a walk. Radio me if something happens." He said as he pushed up from the chair.

"Will do, Lieutenant." One of the officers said and he left the room, walking around the Alliance compound to stretch his legs.

"Uh, Lieutenant?" He heard over the radio in his ear after about 20 minutes of wandering.

"Yeah?" He responded.

"We have a situation with Shepard, you might want to get to her room immediately."

"What kind of situation?" Had she attempted to escape? No, she wouldn't. She turned herself in voluntarily. They weren't on alert, so she wasn't being attacked so what was...

"Not quite sure, you should see for yourself." He said and Vega turned on a heel, heading back the way he came.

His security pass let him into the small apartment she had been given and he stood there for a minute as he watched her peer into a recognizable two toned pink bag, a smile on her face.

"Where the hell did you get that?" He asked, going over to the table.

"It just showed up." She replied simply and he snatched the card from the bag.

 

Enjoy

-K.G

 

"Who the hell is K.G?" He asked, holding the card up and she shrugged.

"No idea." She said, "Whoever they are, they have good taste." She grinned as she reached into the bag, but he pulled it away from her before she could take anything out.

"I'm going to have to search this for contraband." James said with a scowl. The last thing they needed was an N7 Infiltrator to get ahold of an omni-tool.

"Go for it." She said and his scowl deepened at the smirk on her face. No complaints about an invasion of her privacy?

Vega started pulling out various forms of underclothes, bra and panty sets mostly, ranging from casual to far less so. He felt his face flame as she watched him pull out a lace and silk slip, straps for garters dangling. One peek into the bag confirmed that yes, there was a complete set. He held it up, looking from it to her and trying his hardest not to picture her in the ivory colored lingerie and failing miserably, his blood running hot at the image his mind came up with.

"It's not your color." Sarah said, "It's probably not your size either, but I won't judge if you decide to "confiscate it". Are you satisfied?" She asked, her grin turning slightly evil as her gaze raked over his form and he could swear she knew exactly what he was thinking.

Was he satisfied? Not even remotely.

"Yeah, I'm good." He said, putting the items back in the bag and she grabbed it by the white handles, heading for the bathroom.

"Good, because I'm going to try these on. You're free to stay if you want to check the fit." She said over her shoulder as he watched her walk away, trying and failing to keep his eyes off her swaying hips.

Commander Sarah Jane Shepard was going to be the death of him.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Reviews are always lovely!


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I don't own Mass Effect. Bioware does. I just mess with it a bit.

James entered the compound, travel mug of coffee in his hand. Last night had been one of little restful sleep. His mind kept going back to that damn piece of lingerie and the mental image he had made of her in it.

Good thing he had Quarters to himself, as he was sure he had made some very interesting noises in his sleep as he dreamt of her, her back arching towards him, breasts rising and pushing against the silk as she moved against him, in tandem with him, as he buried himself in her to the hilt again and again. Her hands on his chest and back as she held onto him had felt almost real, her long stocking clad legs around his waist as he worshiped her, pleasurable whimpers almost musical in his ear.

He woke painfully hard and quickly took care of the problem, his imagination continuing with the dream even as he was awake until the Shepard in his mind came gasping his name. He still had no idea who K.G. was, but he had a feeling she did. Obviously they were close enough to her to send her sexy small clothes without her worrying.

A boyfriend, maybe. A lover. Someone who knew what she looked like as she...

Turning his head to the side, he popped his neck, pushing those thoughts aside as a wave of jealousy washed over him. He had no right to be jealous of this mysterious "K.G.". Shepard wasn't anything to him but a prisoner whose well being he was put in charge of. Yeah, right.

The area where she was being held was separate from the main compound, accessible only by tramway and his security pass let him onto it, authorizing him in that area. The ride over was quiet, as it always was, a news terminal in the car broadcasting what was going on in the galaxy but he tuned it out, turning it into white noise. The train stopped at the station and he disembarked, heading for the secondary security room to relieve the two man night crew.

The mug hit the floor as he pulled his pistol from his thigh holster. The two guards were dead, killed execution style with a shot to the back of their heads. He went to the video feed, ignoring the blood splattered on the screen went over the footage. Shepard wasn't in her room, but there were signs of a struggle, holes decorating the walls, a couple bodies on the floor. Zooming in on the image, his blood went cold as he saw the bodies up close. Batarians.

Shit shit shit.

He left the room, scanning left and right with the heavy pistol when he heard gunshots further into the compound. Pistol down but still at the ready, he ran through the halls in loping gaits, going towards the sounds of gunfire. Turning a corner, the pistol raised the same time an assault rifle did and there was echoing growls as they lowered, Shepard and Vega looking at each other with identical expressions of frustration.

"Morning, Lieutenant." She said and suddenly shoved him to the side, the rifle coming up as she squeezed the trigger in three round bursts, James looking behind him as the Batarians fell to the ground, dead.

"Where the hell did you get a weapon?!" He demanded and she gave him an annoyed look.

"From one of the assholes trying to kill me, where else?!" Sarah said, "Reese and Reynolds?" She asked but he shook his head. "Fuck. That's what I figured when they weren't with you."

"Give me the gun, Commander." Vega said, holding his hand out for it.

"You're joking!" Shepard exclaimed, "I kind of need it at the moment!" They stared at each other for a moment before he let out another growl.

"I'm getting court martialed for this." James said and she flashed him a quick grin.

"Just tell them I hit you." Sarah said, "But you know what? I'll trade you." They swapped weapons, James checking over the rifle quickly and popping the heat sink, a fresh one sliding into place. "Grab extras from the dead."

"This isn't my first firefight, Shepard." He grumbled but did as she said, sliding the extra thermal clips into the pockets of his BDU pants, tossing a couple to her which she caught one handed. "Why aren't the alarms going off? I didn't even know anything was going down until I got here."

"They disabled the primary security protocols, so that means no Alliance backup either." She said as she programmed the pistol for armor piercing rounds, James doing the same for his rifle. "We need to get them back online. I'll take point."

"Nuh-uh no way. You're still my prisoner, I'll take point."

"You're not worried I'll shoot you in the back?"

"Not even remotely."

"Aw, Vega, I didn't know you cared!" She said and he snorted in spite of himself. "We need to get to the primary control room. Move out."

"Yes ma'am." He said, forgetting for a second she wasn't Alliance anymore. "So why'd you agree to let me take point?" He asked as they moved through the halls.

"You make a good meat shield." She said but he could hear the grin in her voice.

"Just great."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Reviews are always lovely!


	4. Chapter 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I don't own Mass Effect. I just mess with it a bit

For a compound under attack from Batarian extremists, it was awfully quiet as they moved through the halls. They cleared rooms as they went, but Shepard had been the only one housed there for security reasons, a very small crew of only a few guards on at any given time.

“It doesn’t look like they got into the armory.” Shepard said, going to the door, the security lock engaged and raised her hand, an omni-tool turning on and spinning as she bypassed it.

“Where did you get an omni-tool?” He asked and she gave him another annoyed look as the display flashed yellow then green and the door opened. “Right, forget I asked.”

“I’ll give it to you later.” Shepard said and he grunted.

“Appreciate it. It’s bad enough I’m letting you be _armed_ , they’d have my ‘tags if they found out I allowed you an omni-tool.”

“You’ll be fine, James.” She said and he paused for a moment as he modded the assault rifle.

“You called me—" It was the first time since he met her that she had called him anything but "Vega" or "Lieutenant". Hearing her say his name made him just a little happy for some reason.

“Let’s move out, we need to get to the primary security control room before they do something stupid like try to blow the place up.” Sarah said as she strapped another pistol on her hip, reloading the one in her hand and replacing the thermal clip that had been ejected with a fresh one. “You’re on point, I have your six.”

"I'm surprised we haven't come across more of these pendejos." James noted as they left the armory, Shepard locking it down again.

"There will probably be heavier resistance the closer we get to the command center. They might even be calling for reinforcements when they realized I wasn't just going to let them kill me." She said, clearing a room and locking the door behind her.

"How many did you take out before I got here?" He asked, not really sure if he wanted to know the answer. There was silence and he looked back at her, seeing her expression. "That many, huh?"

"They were very annoying."

"No armor, no shields, outnumbered and outgunned." He said, the corner of his lips perking. "That's borderline impressive, Commander." He saw her shrug out of the corner of his eye.

"N7 training is pretty good." She said, her tone neutral, almost bored.

There was a moment of realization that he was fighting alongside Commander Shepard, someone he's looked up to for years when it came to military and combat prowess. Someone who the moment there was news on, James just about dropped everything to read or watch.

His old unit used to make fun of him for the way he would talk about her from time to time, teasing him good-naturedly for his "crush" on the famous Commander Shepard. His heart had pounded in his chest when she had looked at him on the Citadel almost a year ago now, and he would admit to a bit of disappointment when her eyes had left him just as quickly as they touched him.

What had he expected her to do? Notice him? Drop everything she was doing to talk to him, some jarhead she had never met? Give him that teasing, playful smile he knew so well now that made his heart beat just a little faster whenever it was turned on him?

They stopped as they got closer to the command center, hearing Batarian voices just around the corner. Apparently their leader wasn't too pleased that it was taking this long to kill one human woman.

She suddenly pressed a hand to his chest, sliding past him to look around the corner and he looked down at her as she moved against him. He almost wrapped his hands around her waist, sure he could completely encircle it with how slight she was.

Priorities, Vega!

"They don't know we're here so we have the element of surprise." She said, her voice dropping as she looked up at him. He didn't know what she saw in his eyes, but whatever it was made a slight blush come over her face. "Okay, then." She said, looking away from him. "Stay here."

"Wait, what?"

"Stay here." She repeated, "Keep in cover."

"I'm not..."

"That's an order, Lieutenant." She said, her voice going slightly hard.

"I don't take orders from you."

"Do it anyway." She said with a sly grin and she raised her omni-tool. "Now you see me," Pressing a command, her figure digitized and vanished as the tactical cloak was activated. "Now you don't."

"Shepard!" He exclaimed as softly as he could as her hand left his chest, her warmth leaving as well. "Fuck." He heard the omni-blade materialize and he looked around the corner to see one Batarian on the floor in a pool of blood, Shepard deftly disarming the other and putting two in his chest.

"Come on, command center is close."

"I know that. How do you know that?" He asked and she gave him a look. "Never mind."

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Reviews are always lovely!


	5. Chapter 5

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I don't own Mass Effect, I just mess with it a bit

Stupid sexy Vega with his stupid sexy eyes and stupid sexy body.

Sarah might have been a bit more aggressive than she needed to be as she took out the Batarians. The heat that had been in his eyes when she had looked up at him made her breath catch in her throat and she knew she had blushed. His heart had been solid and grounding under her palm and she could tell that he was as hard packed as he looked when she moved past him, making her acutely aware of how long it's been since she...

Down, girl.

As Vega took point again, she allowed herself a half a second's glance as his backside, admiring the way his BDU pants fit him.

Flirting with him was one thing. She mainly did that to fluster him, trying to break through that tough guy exterior. He was a hard assed son of a bitch, that was for certain. Taking away her omni-tool, imposing restrictions.

She nearly laughed herself to tears at how quickly he left her room yesterday, face bright red at the offer she made him to see her in the lingerie Kasumi had gotten her. She would admit to some curiosity at what it would be like to be under (or over) all that raw, masculine power. How those big hands would feel running over her skin, setting nerve endings aflame.

Priorities, Shepard. Priorities.

At long last they reached the control room. There can't have been many Batarians left, given how many she took out before he arrived. They ducked into a utility closet as she brought up her stolen omni-tool, hacking into the security feed to get a good look at the room.

"They're set up in a perimeter around the room." She said, moving over the image, adjusting to see all the angles. "One is by the main controls, four others around the edges."

"How do you want to do this?" James asked, looking over her shoulder at the feed, "That's a death trap. We go straight in and get picked off by the guys on the side." He said, pointing at the holographic screen. "Here and here."

"I have an idea, but you're not going to like it."

"If you even suggest being bait--"

"Fuck, no. They don't want to take me prisoner, Vega, they want me dead." Shepard said. "You're going to stay here while I take care of it."

"What part of "death trap" did you not understand?" Vega said, his hands grabbing her shoulders as he turned her to look at him, "You go in there alone and you die."

"I'll be fine. You can watch the whole thing on your 'tool. If I look like I'm in trouble, feel free to ride in and save the day."

"Shepard..." He didn't like this.

"James, I'll be fine." She reached up, touching the side of his face gently. There was a second as they both went still, the moment stretching between them before her hand dropped and she moved out of the closet, taking the pistols from her hips.

He brought up the security feed on his omni-tool, adjusting it as she walked calmly into the room. The pistols came up and she took out the two James had pointed out at the same time. Dropping the guns to the floor she disarmed and used the closest Batarian as a shield, one of his buddies putting rounds in him as she took him out with one of their own pistols.

The leader tried a hand to hand approach, but was outmatched as Shepard struck him quickly, her fist coming up and knocking his head back, her elbow coming down and slamming him in the hollow of his throat. The omni-blade came out and the Batarian died with it buried in his chest.

Shepard wasted no time, going to the command console and typing into it, but it was taking far longer than it would have were she just putting out a distress signal.

"Shepard! Away from the terminal!" James ordered, coming into the room and she held up her index finger over her shoulder.

"Just a couple more...and done." She backed away from the terminal, turning and dropping into a chair. "Oh, here." She said, taking off her omni-tool and handing it to him. "Alliance should be here soon."

"Thanks." James said as he took it from her, slightly worried at what she had been doing on the terminal, "Nice job, by the way."

"I know a Drell." Sarah said with a shrug, her hands on her stomach as she slouched in the chair.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Reviews are always lovely!


	6. Chapter 6

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I don't own Mass Effect, I just mess with it a bit

Alliance soldiers descended on the facility in force, checking the Batarian dead and finding Vega and Shepard in the control room, the Commander still sitting in her chair. Vega was leaning against the wall, waiting for them, mind still going over she could have possibly done to the system. Whatever it was, it didn’t seem to harm them any, they were still operational and all the security lockdowns had been lifted.

“Lieutenant.”

“Major.” Vega said, giving him a salute.

“At ease.” The Major said, “What happened here?”

“I arrived at the facility at oh-seven hundred hours to relieve the night staff only to find them dead in the secondary control room. I pulled my sidearm and began a sweep of the building to try to find Commander Shepard.” James rehashed.

“When you found her, was she armed?” The Major asked and Vega spared half a second’s glance at the Commander spinning in the chair.

“Yes, Sir, she was.” James said, a sinking feeling starting in the pit of his stomach.

“But he took my gun away.” Shepard interjected from her seat, kicking against the desk and sending herself for another turn. “Asshole, I could have used that.”

“She _let_ you have her gun, Lieutenant?” The Major asked, incredulity obvious in his tone and James paused. “What happened next?”

“We began clearing the facility of Batarians, figuring out early that they had taken control of the primary security room.”

“What was the Commander doing during all this?”

“Being fucking useless,” Shepard said with a snort,  “That’s what.”

“I took point while the Commander followed.” James said.

“Let me get this straight, Lieutenant.” The Major said with a sigh. “ _Commander Shepard_ allowed you to disarm her, then proceeded to follow you through the facility still unarmed.”

“Trust me, the ‘damsel in distress’ role wasn’t a big hit with me, either.” Shepard said, “But he was very brave, Major. Lieutenant Vega, you’re my hero!” A few of the soldiers bit back chuckles at her tone. “You can check the security feed if you don’t believe us. Should still be up and running.”

“We’ll be doing that, Shepard.” The Major said, “The beta site is no longer secure--”

“No, really?”

“Her transfer to Earth has been moved up,” The Major said, giving Shepard a look at her interruption, “There’s a shuttle waiting. Get your things and head out, you leave in an hour.”

“Yes, Sir.” Vega said and Shepard got out of the chair as one of the soldiers approached the terminal.

“After you.” Vega said and she gave him a smirk as she went past.

“Major. Sir.” the soldier at the terminal said.

“What is it Corporal?”

“The security footage.” James stopped on his way out of the room, knowing full well what the footage would show. “There isn’t any. Batarians must have disabled the cameras.”

What?

“There’s nothing?”

“Nothing but snow, Sir.” The Corporal said.

“What about the backups?” Any elation he felt vanished. Of course there were backups.

“Nothing there, either. Wiped clean.”

“How about that.” He heard Shepard say under her breath and he stared after her as she walked down the hall.


	7. Chapter 7

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I don't own Mass Effect, I just mess with it a bit.

The moment Shepard stepped off the shuttle onto the frigate, she was escorted to the brig. The Captain tried to keep James from going with her, but when he was informed that Vega was made her guard under orders from Admiral Anderson, some the bluster left him. The Commander listened to his barking about how it was "his ship" and "his rules" and how he didn't care who she was with a passive expression. That only seemed to anger him further, as she wasn't giving him the reaction he obviously thought he was supposed to get as he pounded his chest in front of the crew.

A female officer reached towards her subtly as she went past and Shepard squeezed her fingers, her hand dropping to her side.

"Who was that?" James asked lowly, leaning into her.

"No idea. I get that sometimes, support from the younger officers, not everyone is like this pendejo." She said, moving her head at the Captain who seemed to love the sound of his voice.

"Pendejo, Shepard?" James asked, his lips perking into a small smile.

"I must be spending too much time around you, Vega. Though not nearly enough for my liking." She said with a grin, her eyes moving over him in an obvious way. He covered his nervous laugh with a cough that caught him a glare from the Captain.

“Your pack will be searched for contraband.” The Captain continued.

“That won’t be necessary, Sir.” Vega said, “Commander Shepard’s belongings were already searched and cleared not only by myself but also by Major Bryce at the Beta Site before we boarded the shuttle.”

“Forgive me _Lieutenant_ , if I don’t trust the judgement of a jarhead with a crush and a Major who’s a member of the Shepard Fan Club.” The Captain said, turning on them.

“There’s an actual fanclub?” Shepard asked, looking back and forth between the two of them, “Are there meetings? A super secret handshake? Please tell me there’s at least some kind of t-shirt that you get.”

“They didn’t have my size.” James said with a shrug, flexing his shoulders for effect and smiled at her laugh, looking away from her as she pushed him playfully.

“Aren’t you two adorable?” His tone made the smile leave her face and she gave him a stony look.

“Captain, what the fuck is your problem?” She asked, crossing her arms over her stomach, taking a defensive stance. “You’ve been nothing but vile and vindictive since I came on board. You could have had one of your Marines escort me to the brig, but no, you had to be Mr. Alpha-Male and do it yourself. It doesn’t make you look tough, it just makes you look like an asshole.”

“Listen here, you Cerberus bitch! I--” It happened so fast that James hadn’t had time to react, one moment the Captain was in her face, the next he was clutching his throat, his face going red, gurgles coming from his gaping mouth as he fell to his knees in front of her.

“You’ll be fine.” She said, squatting in front of him. “Just take slow, easy breaths. Speaking is going to be a bit tough for the next couple of days, so I wouldn’t if I were you. I _used_ Cerberus to stop the Collectors. I took their money, their resources, their crew, hell, I even took their ship. They dumped a lot of credits to bring me back and I gave them the shaft every time I could, but I don’t expect you to understand that or even believe me. Better yet, I don’t _care_ if you believe me. My reasons are my own, but you know, you’re welcome for saving your worthless ass from the Collectors.” With that, she stood, walking into the open cell, the door closing and locking behind her.


	8. Chapter 8

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I don't own Mass Effect, I just mess with it a bit.

The trip to Earth was relatively uneventful. The Captain tried to report her for the hit to his throat, but apparently didn’t get anywhere. She could have easily killed him, but she didn’t, and an assault charge would have been nothing compared to what she was being called to a hearing about with the Alliance brass. His mind kept going over what had happened at the Beta Site, with the security feed having been wiped. He  _knew_ the Batarians hadn’t disabled the cameras, having used them during the incident.

Shepard spent the trip in her cell, either curled up on the cot or doing simple exercises to stay in shape. He kept an eye on her from the security room, looking up at the display to the sound of scared whimpers. She was asleep on her stomach, arm curled around the pillow but even from the feed he could tell she was fitful. She made another sound and turned onto her back, the look of pure terror on her face was like a punch to the chest and he considered going to her. James was about to get up from the chair when she woke with a gasp, laying there for a bit before curling up onto her side, her shoulders shaking.

Shepard didn’t acknowledge the door to her cell opening, the dim lighting turning up a bit.

“Commander?” It was James, of course it was James.

“You’re not supposed to call me that.” She said thickly.

“I know.” He said, sounding closer this time and there was a rustle of cloth. Turning away from the wall, she saw him kneeling next to her cot, worry written plainly on his face. “Nightmares?” He asked.

“The Collector Base.” She said and his hand came up but seemed to hesitate for a moment before he laid it on her shoulder.

“That bad?” He asked and she nodded. “I read your report on it, what they had done to the colonists.”

“I saw one of them. Watched as she was…” she stopped, her eyes squeezing closed. “I couldn’t stop it. I keep hearing her scream, keep seeing her pound against the tube even as she came apart. I couldn’t save her, couldn’t save any of them.”

“Shepard…” He didn’t know what to say. What could he say? “You did everything you could.”

“It wasn’t enough. It’s never enough. Not on Eden Prime, not on Virmire, not on Horizon, and not on the Collector Base. I fight like hell but it’s never enough. People are dead because of me. Three hundred thousand Batarians are dead because of me, worlds turned to cinder _because of me_. I think I killed more than the Collectors did. Does that make me worse than them?”

“Fuck, Shepard.” James sighed, "The Collectors were monsters. _You're_ not a monster."

"Tell that to the Hegemony." She said, rolling over so her back was to him. James stayed there for a bit before he sighed, getting to his feet and leaving the cell.

She looked tired as they disembarked from the frigate, hitching her bag higher her shoulder. It was sunny in Vancouver, and there was a slight chill to the air as well as the smell of salt from the ocean. The Alliance car that was going to take them to headquarters was nondescript, probably to not draw attention that Commander Shepard was on Earth. No date had been set for the hearing, so they were still playing the waiting game as she was shown where she was going to be staying until then.

It was smaller than her room the Beta Site, a simple bedroom and attached bath. There was a balcony that overlooked the bay, but the door had been sealed shut. A vid screen sat on one wall, a two person couch facing it.

"We heard what happened at the Beta Site." The younger officer said, "Security has been increased here, but they doubt the Batarians will try to hit Alliance Command."

"The Batarians are pissed and want my head on a pike. They might just risk it." Shepard said and the officer paled a bit.

"Thank you, Corporal." James said and the officer gave them a salute before leaving the room.

"It's been years since I was last on Earth." Shepard said, going over to the large window and looking out onto the city.

"You were a spacer kid, right?" He asked, joining her and she nodded.

"Born and raised on space stations. Didn't even set foot on Earth until after basic training."

"Damn." He said, letting that sink in. "I'm from California. Echo Park." She looked him over quickly, a small smile coming to her lips.

"I can see that. If you told me you were from _Nebraska_ or something, I would have called bullshit." She said, making him smile, “Was it nice there?”

“Parts of it, yeah.” He said, “What station have you been on the most?”

“Arcturus. Mom shipped out a lot from there. Technically, I still have an apartment there.”

“What about your dad?” He asked somewhat hesitantly, his own relationship with his father strained at best.

“Never met him until recently. Mom told me he was dead my entire life, which he might have well been so I don’t fault her for that.”

“What does he do?” James asked, his mind going over likely careers that would have justified _that_ kind of story. If her mom was military, chances are her father was as well. Black Ops, maybe. Something highly classified and dangerous.

“Are we really going to talk about my dad, Vega?” Shepard asked, giving him an amused look.

“I guess not, no.” He said with a crooked smile. Black Ops.

“I’m going to try to get some sleep. I’m still tired from the trip.”

“Yeah, get some rest, Shepard.”


	9. Chapter 9

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I don't own Mass Effect, I just mess with it a bit.

The training area was clear of soldiers as Vega and Shepard ran around the indoor track. He was substantially taller than her, but she set the pace. James was pretty sure she was showing off at times, turning with an almost dancers grace to run backwards on her toes, flashing him smiles before facing forward again.

“You okay, Lieutenant?” She asked as he sat down on a bench, head between his knees.

“ _Dios mio_ how do you run so fast?” He asked sitting back, face red and sweaty, and she laughed.

“Because I’m not covered in hundred pounds of dense, heavy muscle.”

“Hundred? Don’t insult me, Shepard.”

“One-twenty?” She asked, giving him a once over. “My last running partner was a Turian. You want to talk about a long stride? I looked like you until I adapted to his pace.”

“Turian?”

“Yeah. Garrus. Maybe you’ll meet him someday.” She said with a shrug, her expression becoming guarded. “Keep breathing, Vega, I’ll get you some water.” She moved away, heading to the dispenser and he watched her go, his eyes moving over her workout clothes; an Alliance tank top and form fitting running shorts. He might have been running a few steps behind her this entire time on purpose.

Sarah stood at the dispenser, waiting for the bottles of water to drop. Looking over, she saw Vega staring at her, the look on his face making her own warm slightly. Why did he have to look at her like she was something he wanted to devour? Suddenly feeling self conscious, she tucked a lock of hair behind her ear, looking him over quickly. He looked fantastic in his exercise clothes, the dark tank top showcasing his muscular form and dark tattoos on caramel skin, the track pants sitting low but secure on his hips.

The bottles (finally) dropped and she grabbed them, heading back over and handing one out to him. Their fingers brushed as he took it from her, sending what felt like a biotic shock through her fingertips. She cracked the seal on her bottle, almost draining it, watching as he did the same, her eyes moving over the muscles of his throat as he drank.

Vega suddenly stood, standing close enough that she could feel the heat of his skin and he looked down at her with those unfairly hazel eyes.

James knew the tint to her cheeks had nothing to do with running and he set the bottle on the bench next to him as he stood, watching as her lips parted. He knew he shouldn't. Knew it could land him in all kinds of trouble. His hands slid around her tucked in waist, her shiver at his touch making him bite his bottom lip briefly as he pulled her closer, their bodies just barely brushing against each other, fingertips pushing under the hem of her shirt to touch the skin of her back.

Those brilliant green eyes stared up at him and he bent at the shoulders, head canting to the side as he--

"Sarah Shepard." He pulled away from her at the voice, his hands dropping as he took a couple steps to the side, putting distance between them.

"Yes, what is it?" She sounded angry as she turned to the speaker.

"Admiral Anderson wanted this report forwarded to you."

"About what?" She asked, taking the data pad from him, a furrow appearing between her brows.

"A mercenary you requested that he keep an eye on. Zaeed Massani?" The curiosity in the MP's voice was obvious.

"Yes, thank you." Sarah said, the furrow vanishing as a small crooked smile formed. "That will be all."

"Yes, ma'am." The MP turned and left.

"Mercenary?" James asked, trying to get his heart rate under control again.

"Someone I worked with against the Collectors." She said as she read. A range of expressions crossed her face; concern, annoyance, a little bit of anger, but when she turned off the pad, a fond smile pulled at her lips, her eyes soft.

"Someone important?" James asked, his curiosity rising at who this Zaeed could be to her to put such a look on her face.

"Something like that." She said simply, "Just want to make sure he's okay after we all went our separate ways. Thanks for the run, James. We should head back."

"Yeah." He said, feeling in the need of a cold shower--or two.


	10. Chapter 10

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I don't own Mass Effect

They didn’t talk about what had almost happened. There was nothing to talk about. The interruption hadn’t been welcome, but it had been a blessing. James escorted her back to her quarters and headed for the crew showers to wash the sweat off his skin.

He went to visit her later on, having gotten used to spending a lot of one-on-one time with her at the Beta Site. She was curled up on the small couch facing the vid screen, moving her head at him in greeting before turning her attention back to it. Shepard looked comfortable in her sweatpants and Alliance hooded sweater, her feet bare.

"Watching anything good?"

"Not really, just flipping through." Sarah said with a shrug. "Join me, if you want." He paused for a moment before giving a shrug of his own and walked over to the couch.

"Move over." Not that there was much room on the couch to begin with, but she managed to make some room for him, though his large frame took up most of it. She ended up touching his side, knees drawn to her chest as they sat there in a companionable silence.

"Any news on when the hearing might be?" She asked after a bit.

"Nothing yet." He said, "Doubt they'd tell me anyways."

"Damn. I hate the waiting. I'd like to know sooner rather than later if they're handing me over to the Hegemony to be executed." 

"I doubt they'd do _that_ , Shepard."

"We'll see." She sounded so resigned to that fate that he looked at her, seeing her looking straight ahead at the screen but not really seeing it. Giving a sigh, he put his arm around her slender shoulders and pulled her against him, his hand rubbing her arm.

She settled against his side, head on his shoulder as she accepted the comfort he was offering in silence. 

Sarah felt so small against him, her warmth seeping into his skin and the gentle smell of her hair entering his nose every time he drew breath. He found himself looking down at her from time to time, his arm shifting as he pulled her closer. She shifted every now and then, tucking herself into his side more and making the corner of his lips perk slightly in a smile. For someone as famous (or infamous) as she was, she was awfully cute sometimes.

They sat there in the silence, Sarah under his arm as they watched some documentary on Thessia. It felt almost...natural to be with her like this, comfortable to be this close to her. If she wasn’t awaiting trial, he would say it was almost domestic.

“Tell me something, Shepard.” James started and she made a acknowledging sound. “What’re you going to do if they have the hearing and you’re let free.”

“That’s...not going to happen, James.” She said.

“With everything you’ve done? It’s an option.”

“It really isn’t. An entire system was decimated when the Alpha Relay was destroyed. They can’t just...let me go. The Hegemony would retaliate. Big time."

"But you stopped Saren, saved the Citadel, defeated the Collectors--" She pulled away from him then, looking at him.

"And caused the deaths of over three hundred thousand Batarian men, women, and children." Sarah said and he sighed.

"To save everyone from the Reapers who were going to use the Alpha Relay to come through." He said and she gave him a look, "The Admiral thought I should know what's up."

"Good ol' Anderson." She said and, to his surprise, settled back against him with a sigh, tucking herself under his arm again. "I just...don't want to talk about this right now."

"Sorry I brought it up."

"Don't be." She said, turning her attention back to this screen. "You know, I think I'd like to go to Thessia someday."

"Yeah?"

"I know someone from there, I'm sure she wouldn't mind showing the sights."

They sat there until the documentary ended and it was getting late. Going to move, James stopped as she made a small sound and he looked at her, seeing her asleep against him. Sliding out from her side slowly, he held her in his arms and picked her up easily.

"James?" She asked sleepily.

"Go back to sleep, Sarah." He whispered and she pressed her cheek against his chest, her eyes closing again.

Laying her down on the bed, he pulled the blanket over her, tucking her in gently. Leaning over her, he hesitated for a moment before pressing his lips to her forehead. His heart skipped a beat as she gave a contented hum at the contact, her lips curling into a small smile.

"Thane..." She whispered, her eyes staying closed and she slipped back under.

There was a weight in his chest as he left her to sleep without a word, locking the door behind him.


	11. Chapter 11

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I don't own Mass Effect.

James spent the next morning going through her file, trying to find out who this "Thane" guy was. No one in the Alliance by that name has ever crossed paths with her, but they had intercepted messages to her from an unknown sender.

The writer of the messages had called her "Siha", and the word occurred far too often for it to be some strange typo of her name. The ones in the beginning were of a familiar nature, but it seemed as time wore on, the sender suspected they weren't getting through, so the messages became clipped, formal, before stopping completely.

Almost all of her known associates were accounted for but there was a reference to an assassin that had worked with her against the Collectors in her file. Race, name, and gender were unknown. It seemed they vanished as soon as she had decided to turn herself and the Normandy over to the Alliance, their whereabouts also unknown. 

Way too many unknowns for his liking.

After a couple hours of getting nothing, he closed out the file. 

Vega let out a frustrated sound, scrubbing his face with his hands. What was he doing? What business was it of his who this guy was whose name she said while mostly asleep? It wasn't. It was none of his business. He needed to stop acting like he had some claim over her.

"Attention on deck!" He stood up from his chair in a shot, his hand snapping up in a salute as the Admiral came into the room.

"At ease." He said and James relaxed. "Lieutenant Vega, just the person I was looking for."

"Admiral Anderson, how can I help you?" He asked, looking at the aging officer.

"I need you to get Shepard for a meeting with the Defense Council, she's needed ASAP." His tone worried him.

"Admiral?" James asked.

"Just...get the Commander, Lieutenant." Anderson said on his way out the door again, "I need to pick up some more intel, I'll meet you there."

"Yes, Sir." James said, watching him go before following. The halls were busy with people running this way and that and he could tell something big was going down, or about to go down.

He made it to her room, the door opening with his pass and she turned away from the large window to look at him. She was dressed simply in a pair of jeans and her Alliance hoodie, plain sneakers on her feet.

"Commander, you have to come with me." James said and she gave him a look at his tone.

"You're not supposed to call me that anymore, James." She said, but there was no teasing lilt to her voice.

"Yeah, I know." He said and she tossed the datapad in her hand on the bed, following him out the door.

"What the hell is going on, Vega?" She asked, moving around people as they almost jogged down the hall.

"No idea. Alliance brass needs to see you now."

"About time for my damn hearing, but they could have least given me some--"

"Shepard!" They both looked over, seeing Anderson coming towards them at a quick clip.

"Anderson." Sarah said in greeting as they shook hands, James giving another salute. "What's going on, David?" She asked as they continued down the hall, skipping the pleasantries.

"We don't know." Anderson said, "But something big is on radar, and it's on it's way...fast."

"The Reapers?" Sarah asked and he paused on his way up the steps.

"If I knew that..." He gave a defeated shrug.

"Well what the fuck else could it be?" She asked, taking the stairs two at a time to catch up to him, James trailing a few steps behind, not quite sure what to do. "We're not ready if it is them. We're going to get spanked in a spectacular way."

"Eloquent as always."

"You don't need me to talk pretty, David, just to shoot a gun."

"That's not the only reason why we need you. You know more about the Reapers better than anyone alive. Shit, Sarah, you talked to one! Then blew the damn thing up!"

"Yeah, I remember." She said, "Is that why you took away my ship? My tags?"

"No, that's why we've been stalling the Hegemony for the past six months while we could figure out what to do with you!" Anderson exclaimed, turning to her. "That mess with the Alpha Relay, you should be in a max sec prison right now, not under house arrest, but the Defense Council trusts your word on the Reapers."

"The Council is the waste of goddamn time, Anderson! You and I both know that. The Reapers don't want to talk to us, they want to kill us! Our salvation is our destruction, remember?"

"They're just scared, Sarah." He said and she sighed.

"Yeah, well, they should have listened to me three years ago."

"Sarah." They turned, seeing the other officer there. His skin was a shade lighter than hers, his hair short and dark.

"Kaidan." She said and he came over to them, shaking hands with Anderson.

"Major, what's going on in there?" He asked.

"I've said my piece, they're just waiting on her." He said, moving his head at her.

"Major?" Sarah asked and he looked at her.

"Yeah, you didn't hear?" He asked, the air getting tense and awkward between them.

"No, I hadn't. Congratulations." She said, looking away from him as she shoved her hands in the pockets of her hoodie.

"Thanks, Shepard." He said and they were called into the room.

"Later, James." She said, pushing his shoulder.

"You remembered I'm here?" He asked and she snorted.

"You're kind of hard to miss, Vega." She said with a roll of her eyes and he caught the Major giving them a look.

"Come on, Shepard, they're waiting for us." Anderson said and she pulled away from them.

"Sarah, good luck." Kaidan said and she spared him a fleeting glance, but didn't say anything.

When they were gone inside the room, James turned to him, seeing him staring after them with a sad expression.

"You know the Commander?" He asked.

"I used to."


	12. Chapter 12

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I don't own Mass Effect

James and the Major seemed to be going the same way as they walked away from the Council room.

"How do you know Shepard?" He asked and James spared him a look.

"Admiral Anderson made me her guard in case the Hegemony, well, you know."

"Yeah, I read about what happened at the Beta Site."

"Really."

"Yeah, and I don't believe for a second that she followed you unarmed while you retook the compound single handed." Kaidan said, but he sounded amused not angry.

"Fuck."

"Don't worry, Lieutenant. She has that effect on people." He said, still sounding thoroughly amused.

"Yeah, I'm pretty sure it's impossible not to be--" his words were cut off as the building was rocked by an explosion. "What the fuck?!"

"My God." Kaidan said, looking out the large window as...something descended on the city.

"You know what that is?" James asked and he nodded, all color leaving his face.

"Yeah, but I haven't seen one in three years. It was going by Sovereign."

"That's..."

"A Reaper."

"The explosion." James said, "It came from the conference room. Shepard!"

"We need to get to the Normandy!"

"The fuck we do! I'm going back!"

"Lieutenant, either Shepard is alive and which case she's going to be heading for the Normandy, or she's...not." Kaidan said, his voice catching on the word. "But we need to get to the Normandy and try to raise Anderson."

"If he's still alive." James said, "Fuck!"

"Exactly. Now let's move out, we'll grab weapons on the way."

"Yes, Sir." James ground out, letting out a sound of frustration, running after the Major as they made their way to the armory.

Vancouver was a war zone. Explosions rocked the air, punctuated by the mechanical bass of the Reapers main weapon. They both made sure they had plenty of thermal clips as they raced towards the docks.

"Husks!" Kaidan called out and James heard the wheezing roars as the creatures swarmed. His omni-tool let out a Carnage burst and one exploded, several others around it exploding with it. "Nice. Lieutenant!"

James staggered as the weight hit his back, yelling with pain as he felt teeth sink into his shoulder and he dropped his rifle, reaching behind him and ripping the Husk off his back, throwing it to the ground and crushing it's skull under his boot.

"How bad is it?" Kaidan asked as James looked at the savage bite wound seeping blood and turning his shirt red.

"As long as these guys aren't like zombies and I can't turn into one from a bite, I'll be fine." He said, picking his rifle back up again.

"Let's get to the Normandy and we'll put medi-gel on it." Kaidan said and they started moving again. “Get down!” he hissed and they ducked behind cover, out of sight from some abominations. The sound of them ripping pieces off the dead and devouring them was sickening, his stomach turning.

“What are those things? Some new kind of husk?” James asked.

“I don’t know, never seen them before.” Kaidan said, “On my mark.” Biotics crackled over his skin and they stood out of cover as he lifted a couple into the air, James taking them out with bursts of rifle fire. The ones remaining opened fire on them with weapons that seemed to come from their very bodies. Kaidan’s comm crackled in his ear and he put his finger to it. “I’m here, Admiral. Lieutenant Vega is with me and we’re en route to the Normandy but we’re taking heavy fire. Is Shepard…” James looked over at him, tension leaving his shoulders as the Major gave a relieved sigh, looking back at him with a nod. “Yeah,” he said with a chuckle, “That sounds like her. We’ll meet you there.”

“Shepard?” James asked as they stood out of cover, taking out the remaining Reaper forces before moving forward again.

“Pissed as hell and cursing a blue streak.” Kaidan said.

“Sounds like her.” James said with a small grin, “Motherfucking shit-balls…”

“Fucking goddamn piss ass…”

“Reaper motherfuckers.” James finished off their little imitation and they shared a chuckle despite the seriousness of their situation.

“There’s something wrong with us.” Kaidan said.

“Yeah, her name is Sarah Jane Shepard.”


	13. Chapter 13

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I don't own Mass Effect

They made it to the Normandy, running up the docking ramp with it closing behind them, cutting off the Reaper forces charging after. Going to the bridge, Kaidan sat himself down in the co-pilots chair.

“Docking clamps are still engaged.” He said, going over the readings, “Hey, Joker.”

“Kaidan, welcome aboard.” The pilot said and looked at James standing there over his shoulder. "Who's the tank?"

"Flight Lieutenant Jeff Moreau, this is Staff Lieutenant James Vega."

"Joker?" James asked, catching what Kaidan had called him before. 

"Long story," he said, "EDI, can you do something about these docking clamps?"

_"Of course, Joker. Hacking docking controls now."_

"That's an...interesting sounding VI." James said.

"VI. Right." Joker said and there was a jolt as the clamps released. "Any word on the Commander?"

"Last time I talked to Anderson, she was with him and they were on their way here, but I'm thinking..."

"Get their location from the Admirals comms and pick them up?" Joker finished.

"You read my mind."

"I thought only biotics could do that." Joker said with a grin. "EDI, can you see if you can triangulate their position if Major Alenko gets ahold of them?"

_"Of course, Jeff, but the Reaper forces are emitting interference that will make that difficult."_

"Do your best, I believe in you."

_"I always run at optimal capacity."_

James put a hand to the cockpit roof as he swayed on his feet when the Normandy took to the air. Being on the ground was one thing, seeing it from the air was another. Buildings burned all over Vancouver, the Reapers casting terrifying silhouettes against the backdrop of the city. There was bursts of light from defense cannons, but it didn't seem to faze the monoliths in the slightest. Even from inside the ship they could hear as one would use its main weapon, leaving a blazing path of destruction in its wake.

"Won't they see us?" James asked.

"Stealth systems are engaged," Kaidan said, "But honestly...I don't know."

"Let's hope not." Joker said, "We upgraded the shields and armor, but I'd rather not test them against a _Reaper_ , thank you very much."

Vega could only watch with something akin to numb horror as Vancouver was destroyed, shuttles attempting to flee the carnage only to be shot down by the Reapers almost casually. He vaguely heard the Major raise Anderson on the comms as they started to do a sweep, trying to pinpoint their location.

An Alliance dreadnought hovered over the city, opening fire on the Reapers with its main guns, but it lasted only a few minutes until the crimson beam hit it, the shock wave from the Eezo core igniting shaking the ship.

"They're by a downed gunship in the harbor, but enemy forces are closing in. Anderson activated the distress beacon." Kaidan said and the Normandy banked, heading towards it, following the navigation HUD.

"I've got a visual." Joker said and they could barely make out the tiny figures of Shepard and Anderson by the craft, taking cover behind debris as they withstood a wave of Reaper forces opening fire on their location.

"They must be out of thermal clips. Joker," Kaidan said as he hopped out of the seat, "Clear the area and drop the cargo hatch. Lieutenant, with me to shuttle bay." James followed him from the bridge, the two soldiers popping the heat sinks of their rifles as they went almost in unison.

Wind whipped through their hair, tugging at their clothes as the hatch dropped. Their rifles raised to give Anderson and Shepard cover fire as they raced up the remains of a support beam, but it seemed like it was unnecessary.

James reached out as she took a running leap, his hand grasping hers and pulling her to him, an arm going around her waist as she steadied herself, looking up at him with grateful eyes. He might have held her a bit longer than he needed to before he let her pull away from him, watching as she turned back, taking in her appearance. Her hoodie was stained and ripped in places, jeans filthy with dirt and soot. The braid she had put her hair in was messy and untied, more to keep it out of her face than anything else, it seemed.

“Come on, old man!” She called out, “It’s not that far of a jump!”

“You’re going without me!” Anderson called back.

“Like hell! Get your ass up here!”

“There’s going to be a resistance and they need a leader.” Anderson said, “Now go! That’s an order!”

“I don’t take orders from you anymore!” Shepard called back and Anderson reached into his pocket.

“Consider yourself reinstated.” He tossed something at her and she caught it with one hand. “ _Commander._ Now get out of here!”

“Keep your ass alive, Anderson!” Sarah yelled, trying to make herself heard over the sound of the engines, “We’ll be back!” Anderson simply nodded, turning and running back down the beam.

Sarah and James looked out over the harbor, columns of inky black smoke rising into the air from ruined buildings. The dark shapes of the Reapers a grim contrast to the almost perfect blue of the sky and the bright sun. Her hand reached out and grasped his as two shuttles carrying soldiers and civilians took off, her fingers tightening as they were both destroyed by a Reaper. Turning she pressed her forehead to his chest briefly before pulling away and walking into the shuttle bay, the hatch closing.


	14. Chapter 14

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I don't own Mass Effect

Kaidan was checking over their weapons as Sarah and James walked further into the shuttle bay.

“What’s our next step?” Kaidan asked as he looked up, a furrow appearing between his brows as he looked them over. “Where’s Anderson?”

“He stayed behind to help organize the resistance. We’re leaving.” Sarah said, “EDI, you still there?”

_“Yes, Commander.”_

“Who’s piloting the Normandy right now and please say Joker.”

“Hey, Commander.” Joker’s voice came over the intercom and she gave a sigh.

“Take us out, Jeff, fast and quiet.”

“Roger that.”

 _“Leaving?”_ Kaidan asked incredulously, as if there hadn't been an interruption.

“Yes, Kaidan, leaving. Anderson’s ordered us to the Citadel, call in a few favors with the other races for support.” She said, “He thinks me being a former Council Spectre will increase our chances with them, but I doubt it.”

“This is bullshit, we’re not leaving.” James said.

“I agree with Vega. Earth is being destroyed, Shepard, we need to stay and fight.” Kaidan said.

“This isn’t up for debate.” She said evenly and the two men immediately and loudly objected. “Shut the fuck up the both of you!” She snapped and they fell quiet. “I just need to...think. Five minutes, that all I need.”

“Shepard.” James said but she didn’t answer him so he went to her, “Sarah.”

“What, Lieutenant?” She asked and he reached out, holding her chin gently and turned her face to look at him.

“You’re bleeding.” He said, noticing the thin trail of blood down her face from a gash above her brow as she swept her hair out of her eyes.

“I caught some glass when a window exploded, I’ll be fine.” She said, pulling her face from his grasp. “But you get your ass down to the medbay so I can look at that shoulder.”

“Got it.” He said and took a step back, heading for the elevator.

“Sarah, I--” Kaidan started when he was gone, but stopped when she raised a restraining hand.

“Kaidan, just...don’t. Please.” She said, going to the elevator and leaving him alone in the shuttle bay.

James turned when the door opened, watching her walk through, looking exhausted.

“Off with the shirt and sit down.” Sarah said, going over to a drawer and pulling out gauze, antiseptic, and a packet of medigel, holding one end and shaking it to force it to the other. James did as he was told, sitting down on a gurney and stripping off the dirty t-shirt, growling a bit as the movement aggravated his shoulder and the fabric peeled away from his skin.

Pushing her sleeves to her elbows, she scrubbed her hands in the sink and disinfected them before going up behind him, pulling on sterile exam gloves.

“What happened?” She asked as she got to work.

“Husk decided it wanted a taste.” James said, _“Fuck!”_ he exclaimed, the wound burning as she cleaned it.

“Sorry.” she said, her touch light as she wiped the soaked gauze over the wound, cleaning away the blood. “Took a chunk out of you.” She said, “You’ll have one hell of a scar.”

“And I’ll have one hell of a story to go with it, no?” He said flippantly and heard her tear open the medigel packet. The gel was cool on his skin as she squeezed it onto his shoulder, and her fingers were gentle as she massaged it into the wound, the anesthetic in the gel numbing it and forming a seal to encourage healing. Shepard pressed on a compression bandage to keep it in place, tracing the edges with her fingers so it stayed put before pulling off the gloves, throwing them in the trash.

She went to walk around him, but he caught her hand, pulling her back and wrapping his arms around her waist, burying his face in her sweater that smelled like smoke and ash. There was a moment’s hesitation before he felt her hands on him, one hand weaving into his shorn hair, the other pressing between his shoulders. There had been a second of real fear back on Earth when he had considered the possibility that she might have died in the explosion at Alliance headquarters, or killed by one of the Reaper forces while trying to get to the Normandy. But here she was in his arms; alive and warm and whole.

His arms tightened around her waist as a sigh deflated his chest and her own curled around him protectively, being mindful of his bandaged shoulder, and he selfishly hoped for a moment that maybe she had had the same fear about him that he did about her. His hands went to her hips and he guided her back a step as he got to his feet, looking down at her. A lock of hair had fallen in front of her face again and he brushed it aside with his fingertips, tucking it behind her ear.

“We should clean up that cut and get some medi-gel on it.” He said, his voice low.

“I’ll be fine, James.” She said, looking up at him.

“I’m serious, Shepard, we don’t know how deep it is and--” He had taken her chin in his hand again, turning her head to look at the wound above her eye. “It’s gone.”

“Upgraded my cybernetics while I was working with Cerberus to stop the Collectors.” She explained. “I won’t heal _immediately_ , but small stuff heals pretty quickly. Bigger shit like knife wounds or bullet holes I’ll still need medi-gel or a doctor if it’s serious enough, but cuts and scrapes are no big deal.”

“Uh, Commander?” Joker’s voice filtered into the medbay. “If you and the walking wall are done with cuddle time, Admiral Hackett is on the QEC for you.”

“Patch it into the medbay, and we’ll have a conversation later about your peeping tom tendencies.” Shepard said and went over to a consul.

Grabbing his shirt, he held it in his hand, leaving the medbay so she could talk to the Admiral in private.


	15. Chapter 15

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I don't own Mass Effect

Not really having any alternatives, James put his ruined t-shirt back on as he went over the variety of rifles, pistols, and shotguns aboard the Normandy.

"Gear up." He heard, looking over his shoulder as Sarah walked into the shuttle bay. "Citadel is going to have to wait, Hackett is sending us to the Mars Archives."

"What's in the Archives?" Kaidan asked, getting up from his seat at the workbench.

"No clue." She admitted with a shrug, "But he thinks there's something there that'll give us an edge against the Reapers, and honestly, we don't have the luxury of being picky. ETA in about forty-five minutes.”

“We don’t have armor.” Kaidan pointed out, “No breather helmets, nothing.” She didn’t respond, going over to a set of lockers set against the wall.

“Kaidan, yours is here.” She said, slapping her palm against it, going to the one next to it and doing the same, “James, this one is yours. Anderson was going to have the both of you transferred to his command so your gear was brought to the Normandy a couple days ago. Surprise!”

“What about you?” Kaidan asked.

“Yeah, I was going to be too following my hearing.” She said, “As a “Probationary Executive Officer”. Basically, they were going to reinstate me, but put me on a leash in case I got uppity.”

“Uppity?”

“That was a phrase used in the file that EDI thought I should read.” She said, opening a locker at the far end, pulling out a set of N7 armor. “Enough talk. Grab your gear.”

Wind from the approaching sandstorm buffeted the shuttle and Shepard stood behind the pilot's chair as James guided it to the archives.

“Commander,” Joker said over the comms, “EDI and I have been trying to raise the facility, but we’ve got nothing.”

“Reapers?” She asked.

“Not that we can tell. Maybe they just took a coffee break?”

“At the same time?” She asked and he made a sound of amusement.

“Fair point.”

_“Shepard, it is possible once news of the Reapers on Earth reached the outpost, the scientist and soldiers were evacuated.”_

“Yeah, EDI, it’s possible, but I don’t think it’s likely. I’ve got a bad feeling.” Sarah said and the comm went dark. “Take us in, James. Nice and easy.”

“Don’t worry Sarah, I’ll be gentle.” The sound of her hand hitting the top of his breather helmet echoed through the shuttle and he gave a short laugh.

Landing on a natural platform, they secured their helmets and readied their weapons, the hatch on the shuttle raising. The wind howled across the landscape, a massive dust storm rolling on the horizon.

“We’ll have about a half an hour until that storm hits and we lose comms with the Normandy.” James said as he programmed his rifle.

“Half an hour to get in and out, no problem." She said as she did the same.

"Still got that bad feeling, Shepard?" Kaidan asked.

"Yep, and it's gotten worse since we landed." She said and they started forward, rocks and dirt crunching under their feet.

She stayed back, looking out over the landscape when they came across the dead Sergeant slumped against the generator.

"Now I'm starting to get that bad feeling." Kaidan said as he grabbed the Sergeant's tags, putting them in a pocket on his hip.

"Something happened or is still happening here. Probably why we couldn't raise anyone." Sarah said, "Be on your guard but don't do anything hasty."

"Roger that."

"Aye, aye ma'am." Kaidan said and they moved out again. There was nothing they could do for Sergeant Reeves anymore. "Didn't Admiral Hackett say Liara was here?"

"That he did." Sarah said.

"But you don't sound very...optimistic." Kaidan pointed out and they heard her sigh over the comms.

"Kaidan, we just found a highly trained Alliance soldier shot in the head with no signs of a struggle. You know how much I hate seeing dead friends, but no, I'm not very optimistic." Sarah said, “Here’s hoping I’m pleasantly surprised.”

Gunshots echoed across the terrain as they came closer to the compound and Sarah directed them behind a security checkpoint blockage, putting her rifle away and removing her N7 Valiant from her back, the stock unfolding and the barrel extending as she braced it. There were a few bodies on the ground, their Alliance uniforms recognizable even from a distance, one soldier on his knees in a clear surrender in front of troopers in scuffed white armor. They watched as one of them checked over a pistol in his hand before pressing the muzzle to the top of the soldier’s head and pulling the trigger.

“Holy fu--They’re executing them!” James exclaimed in a strained whisper over the comms.

“Shepard, they don’t know we’re here,” Kaidan started, “How do you want to handle this?”

“You got the guys on the right, James you got the guys on the left. Kaidan, use your biotics for crowd control. James, fire off a Carnage and take out their armor. I got the big guy in the middle, on my mark.” He eye went to the scope the best she was able with her visor and there was moment of silence before the trooper’s head vanished in a pink mist. Two more died the same way before the thermal clip ejected and she took out her Avenger.

The firefight was over quickly, the three working together as a unit. Kaidan lifted a couple to keep them out of the fight while James compromised the armor of the others, joining Sarah in taking them out in well placed shots.

“Go team.” She said as they pushed forward, moving down the hill. “Check your clips and let’s see who these guys are.”


	16. Chapter 16

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I don't own Mass Effect

Cerberus. Of _course_ it was Cerberus. Sarah could feel a headache forming between her eyes as they looked over the dead, trying to find some information as to why they were here, but found nothing.

“You had no idea they were here? Or why?” Kaidan asked, the accusation clear in his tone and Sarah turned to look at him, James moving several feet to the side as if to stay out of her line of sight.

“No, Kaidan, I didn’t and don’t. I’m not with Cerberus anymore, I was never officially _with_ them.” She said, her voice hardening.

“It’s just a little convenient, don’t you think? You’re here, they’re here.” He said, clearly stuck on completing his suspicious tirade.

“Well, fuck, Kaidan! You found me out!” She exclaimed, throwing her hands in the air dramatically. “We don’t have _time_ for this, Major. Let’s just...get to the Archives.” For a moment it looked like he wasn’t going to drop it.

“Aye, aye ma’am.” He said and they continued forward, taking out another small squad of Cerberus troopers before reaching the airlock for the Archives.

“Sarah,” James started, “Didn’t you tell Cerberus to fuck off after you flashed that Collector base?”

Sarah knew he was asking because of Kaidan, in defense of her in light of his accusations and it made the corners of her lips tug in a tiny smile, unseen by them. “In not so many words, it was more a gesture, but yeah.” She said and he made a sound. “What?”

“Nothing, it’s just...I don’t think they’re fighting for the good of humanity anymore.”

“Yeah, me neither.” She sounded almost sad as she said it, giving a weary sigh as they went into the airlock, the door closing behind them. Sarah went over to the terminal, pressing controls on it to pressurize the area.

“Okay, Shepard, before we go any further, I need you to be straight with me.” Kaidan said, going over to her and she pressed her gloved hand to her faceplate.

“Kaidan…”

“Don’t ‘Kaidan’ me, Sarah! This is business and you damn well know it!” He exclaimed, pointing a finger at her, “Did you or did you not know that Cerberus was going to be here?”

“No, I didn’t.” She said, her tone tired. “I have had no contact with Cerberus since I surrendered myself over to the Alliance six months ago.”

“Major,” James cut in, “Shepard has been under constant surveillance, there is _no way_ she was in contact with Cerberus or The Illusive Man.”

“Kaidan, after everything we’ve been through _together_ , you should know me better than anyone.” She said, going over to him and laying her hand on his shoulder. There was a hiss from the vents overhead and they removed their helmets, hooking them to their belts as the lift started to rise. “But I _need_ to know that you trust me, that you have my back.” With a sigh, Kaidan reached out, holding the side of her jaw in his hand, looking down at her.

“I do, Sarah.” He said and her hand came up to lay over his, her fingers curling around it. “I’m sorry, it’s just after Horizon, I--”

“Quiet, do you hear that?” She pulled away from him, heading into the cargo bay. There was shuffling, banging overhead, the familiar pop!-bang! of bullets hitting metal and they took out their guns, taking cover behind a exploration vehicle as a vent was kicked out. The was a discordant sound of biotics, followed by more gunshots and Sarah looked around the corner only to lean back against the vehicle, a smile on her face. Putting her pistol back on her hip, she walked out from around it.

James raised his rifle at the Asari, dead Cerberus troopers on the ground in front of her, but Shepard put her hand on the muzzle, pushing it down lightly.

“Easy there, big guy. She’s a friendly.” Sarah said, her smile growing. “Liara.”

“Shepard!” The Asari exclaimed as she saw them, going over to her to be quickly pulled into a hug which she returned just as enthusiastically. “I’m so happy to see--” It was cut off by a squeal as she was suddenly lifted off her feet. “Shepard!” She set her down again but they didn’t pull away from each other, Sarah’s arms staying around her waist, her hands pressed to her lower back as Liara brushed the hair that had escaped her braid away from her face. The embrace was somewhat intimate, especially when one of Shepard’s hands came up, fingertips moving over the side of Liara’s face to cradle the back of her neck.

“Are you hurt?” she asked, her voice soft, but she shook her head.

“I’m fine, Sarah, I had a barrier up the whole time.” Liara said, “But what about you? I heard about the Reapers, Admiral Hackett told me they attacked Earth. Was it bad?”

“Yeah.” Kaidan said, seemingly unperturbed by the closeness of the two women, “It was tough leaving like that.”

“Kaidan, I am so sorry.” Liara said looking at him, then turned her attention to James who was standing there. “I don’t think we’ve met.”

“Uh, no.” James said, moving forward with his hand out. “Lieutenant James Vega, I was assigned as Commander Shepard’s guard while she was on lockdown.”

“And she decided to keep you when they left Earth?” She asked, taking his hand and squeezing it, but still maintaining her contact with Sarah, the Commander’s hand on her waist.

“Yeah.” James said with a small laugh, “I guess you could say that.” Her eyes moved over him in a way that reminded him very much of Shepard, the corner of her lips curling into a small smirk.

"How about that." She said and he coughed into his hand nervously.

“Hackett told me you were here, but didn’t really explain why.” Shepard said and Liara turned her focus back to her, “Something about a way to stop the Reapers?"

"Yes, after I heard about what happened with the Alpha Relay, I knew it was only a matter of time before the Reapers began their invasion." Liara explained, "I approached him as an information broker and we pooled our resources. That eventually led us here."

"Liara, we've known about and been studying the Archives for thirty years." Kaidan said, "Why are we only finding this now?"

"I have no idea. Perhaps it was too buried, or we were looking elsewhere, or perhaps it needed a very specific sequence of events to unfold for it to reveal itself." The Asari theorized.

"Like the Reapers attacking." Sarah said and she nodded.

"Precisely."

"You mind telling us what "it" is?" James asked, crossing his arms over his chest.

"It's a weapon, sort of. More a blueprint for a weapon." Liara said, "We didn't have much time to study it before Cerberus attacked, but if our hunch is correct, this might be the only thing that can stop the Reapers."

“And anything that might be powerful enough to stop the Reapers…” Kaidan started.

“Might be the thing that got Cerberus’ panties in a bunch.” Sarah said, “Where is this blueprint?”

“In the Archives across the tramway, granted Cerberus hasn’t locked it down.” Liara said and they all looked up at a door above them as the sound of a cutting torch broke through the space of the cargo bay.

“They know they have company.” Sarah said, taking her rifle from her back.

“Took them long enough.” James said doing the same but she turned to him, stilling his hands as he went to program it. “What?”

“I need you to head back to the shuttle.” She said and he gaped at her.

_“What?”_

“If Cerberus gets to the Archives before us, I need someone covering the exits.” She said, “Also, if shit goes pear shaped and we need to bug out, I don’t want to wait for the engine to warm up, got it?”

“Yeah, I got it.” He said, though he still didn’t sound happy about it.

“Good, now get lost before they break through and keep in radio contact for as long as you can.” She said and he headed back to the lift at a jog. Shepard watched it lower, only turning back when she had lost sight of him. “All right, get to cover and let’s make quick work of these _pendejos._ We don’t have a lot of time.”


	17. Chapter 17

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I don't own Mass Effect

He _hated_ being benched. He understood her reasoning, but it still sucked. James alternated between sitting inside the shuttle and walking around the outside of it, nervous energy making him restless. Every once in a while he would hear the faint sounds of gunfire, the thin atmosphere allowing the sound to carry greater distances. The dust storm seemed to be closer every time he looked over at the horizon, but he couldn’t seem to actively watch its approach. It seemed stationary when he did, but when he looked away and looked back, it was just a little bit closer.

The urge to check in on her every so often was strong, but he managed to mostly hold off. The base was probably crawling with Cerberus, and the last thing she needed was him distracting her by constantly pinging her comms. He did, however, check his connection with Normandy often, not amused by how much Joker was at the fact that Shepard had him sit out while she stormed the Archives with Major Alenko and Dr. T’Soni.

“Liara’s there, huh?” Joker asked and James made a face at the comms at his tone.

“Yeah, she is.”

“That must have been some reunion between those two.” He still didn’t like his tone.

_“Joker, I am having problems maintaining a clear connection with the shuttle, and I’m sure Lieutenant Vega has other things to do.”_

“Hey, he contacted me!”

“Before I cut off, EDI?”

_“Yes, Lieutenant?”_

“You’re not a VI, are you.” He made a statement not a question, and there was a weighty pause.

_“No, James, I am not. I’m an Artificial Intelligence, fully self aware.”_

“Knew it.” James said with a sound of amusement.

_“Will this be a problem?”_

“Not with me.”

_“That is good. Due to your physical stature and military proficiency, you will have a place of power in my bio-synthetic army.”_

There was another long pause.

_“That was a joke.”_

“Shuttle out.” James said and shut down the comms, leaving him in silence again.

Liara T’Soni.

Kaidan Alenko.

The names were so familiar, like a nagging at the back of his mind, but he just couldn’t seem to recall where he had heard them before. They had both known Sarah for a lot longer than he has, but from where? She and Major had a history, that much was obvious, he caught him giving her looks from time to time, a mix of sadness and regret with some longing thrown in, but he had always looked away when Sarah had turned her attention to him. The touch he had given her also spoke volumes as to their relationship, whatever the manner of that relationship might be.

The Asari was another matter. She and Shepard were _very_ comfortable around each other, and she had more than content with staying in close physical contact with her as they spoke.

Kaidan Alenko.

Liara T’Soni.

Kaidan Alenko.

Liara T--

Son of a bitch.

Shepard’s memorial service almost three years ago now. They had both been there, spoken about her bravery and strength in the face of incredible odds, but there has been a great deal of emotion behind their words, plain to see for everyone that had watched it. She obviously had history between the two, something she _didn’t_ have with him.

Fuck, he needed to stop thinking about this. He was a grown man, not some fanboy with a damn crush. Focus, Vega, focus.

Shepard might have been a tad more aggressive than she needed to be as they took out the Cerberus troopers guarding the tram station. Kaidan’s idea of using a helmet-to-helmet comm to get it unlocked had been a good one, and she was once again reminded at how much a damn good soldier he was. It was one of the reasons why he was always on her ground team back when they were fighting Geth and working to stop Saren.

But comparing her to a husk? Accusing her of being a puppet controlled by the Illusive Man? Oh, she had wanted to hit him. They had nearly had it out right there before she had mentally taken a step back, breathing in deep to calm herself. Any feelings that might have reared their misshapen heads again were quickly squashed by his inability to _listen._

It was good to see Liara again, though, especially with everything she and Sarah have been through.

Kaidan and Liara both looked over at Shepard when she suddenly gave out a joyful laugh, fearing for her sanity as she stood in front of a weapons locker.

“What?” Liara asked, “What did you find?”

“Oh, my old friend.” She said, setting her Avenger aside and pulling out a battle rifle, raising it to check the sights. “The M-15 Vindicator, favored by mercenary groups in the Terminus Systems, fires in three round bursts and packs one hell of a punch. My love for this gun knows no bounds.”

“The Vindicator has a terrible ammo carry and low thermal clip---” Kaidan paused, “Shepard, are you petting the gun.”

“Shh.” She whispered to it while looking at him, “Don’t listen to him, baby, he doesn’t know what he’s saying.”


	18. Chapter 18

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I don't own Mass Effect

Sarah shuddered as they walked into the Archives, a feeling like spiders crawling down her spine as she looked at the Prothean device housed in the containment field. It looked far too similar to one on Eden Prime, only this one was bigger. Kaidan started doing a perimeter sweep of the spacious area as she and Liara went to the terminal, the Asari getting to work as Shepard kept an eye out.

“Sarah.” Liara started, as if picking up on her discomfort. “Are you all right?’

“I’m fine. Just...get the data so we can get the hell out of here.” She said, adjusting her grip on her rifle. “I need off this rock.”

“I’ll work as quickly as I can.” She said with a nod, turning her attention back to the terminal as Sarah stared up at the device, her jaw clenching as the feeling of phantom fingers from three years ago wormed their way into her brain.

 _“Shepard.”_ She turned, seeing the projection and sighed.

“Illusive Man.” Liara said, her submachine gun out.

“How’s it going Tim? The wife, the kids?” Sarah asked and even through the hologram she could see his annoyance.

“Tim?” Liara asked.

“The Illusive Man.” Sarah said, “T-I-M.”

 _“I see your time incarcerated hasn’t helped your deference.”_ He said with a sigh, rubbing a twitch that formed above his eyebrow.

“Hey, I can show a lot of deference.” She caught the look Liara gave her out of the corner of her eye, “When the person earns it.”

_“I believe I’ve earned it when I brought you back.”_

“I paid you back for that, Tim, more than by taking out the Collectors. In fact you owe me.”

_“Do I, now?”_

“Liara, my beautiful blue flower.” She turned her attention back to the Asari who was watching the exchange curiously, “He’s a hologram, he can’t do anything. The data please.”

“Of course, Shepard.” She turned back to the terminal.

"What the hell you doing here, Tim?" Sarah asked, "Earth is under attack and you pull this shit?"

 _"I'm here for the same reason you are, Shepard."_ He said, looking behind her at the device and she sighed. _"Due to our history of working with one another, I will give you the luxury of one warning: walk away."_

"Sorry, nope, can't do that. Not when you obviously have your head up your ass."

_"You trusted me with the Collector base, trust me now."_

"Yeah, and look what you did with it. I've seen your soldiers and what you've done to them. What the fuck. You're the reason why I have trust issues, Timmy." Sarah said and he pinched the bridge of his nose.

_"Sarah..."_

"Damnit, Jack! We need to stop fighting each other when we should be focusing on destroying the Reapers."

_"I don't want to defeat them, Shepard, that is where we differ. Imagine what we could do if we were able to control them."_

"Control the..." She paused, "Okay, you've obviously gone round the bend, and even I can't help you anymore. Good bye, Timmy, call me next time you fall down a well."

“Shepard!” Liara exclaimed.

“What? What is it?”

“The data isn’t here. It’s being erased. Someone is downloading it from another terminal.”

“Damnit, Tim!” She turned back to look at him, but the projection had cut off. “Find out where it’s being downloaded from and shut it down!”

“It has to be somewhere local, close enough to the Archives for a secure connection.”

“Back away from the terminal!” Kaidan’s shout from around the corner had her raising her rifle and there was a crackle as the device went dark, a figure running past a moment later. Even from the brief glance, Sarah recognized them as the scientist from the security footage. Dr. Eva Core. “She has the data!” 

“Son of a--” it cut off with a growl as Shepard raced after her, “Get ahold of the Normandy! Now!”

James swung back and forth in the pilot’s chair in the shuttle, kicking against the bottom of the controls to turn the chair this way and that. Even as the dust storm rolled closer, his comms with the Normandy stayed mostly strong, but he was unable to get a connection with Shepard and the Major. Omni-tool tracking had them still moving through the Archives.

“ _\--ames!”_ The Commander’s panicked voice crackled over the comms and he sat up in the seat.

“Commander!” He tried to respond but got nothing but static.

_“James?! Norman--?!”_

The engines came to life and the shuttle took to the sky, his eyes going from the controls to the HUD, tracking them to a rooftop on the far side of the compound.

“Joker!” He called over the comms.

“I heard!” Joker responded, “We’re en route but you’ll get there before we will.”

_“James?! Normandy?! Anybody?!”_

Just as he came over a rise, he saw the Cerberus shuttle take flight, Shepard in her recognizable dark armor chasing after it.

This was going to suck.

There was a crunch of metal as he rammed into it with the shuttle, sending it back towards the roof and he barely managed to get control again to do an emergency landing, the shuttle screeching across the rooftop before coming to a halt with a jarring bang that made his ears ring. His muscles screamed as he got to his feet, walking over stiffly and opening the hatch and hopping down.

“Normandy is on its way.” He said as she came over to him, shaking his head to clear his vision, “Should be here in a couple minutes.”

“Are you okay?” Sarah exclaimed, worry plain in her voice and he nodded.

“Yeah, I’m fine, a little sore--” She suddenly shoved him, grabbing the front of his armor and hauling him down to her level.

“Do something like that again and I’ll fucking kill you myself, got it! Your little stunt nearly killed us!”

“Sarah, I--” There was a yell and the sound of gunshots and she pulled away from him, her pistol out as she went back around the shuttle.

“Put. Him. Down.” Her aim was steady as she drew down on the synthetic holding Kaidan off his feet by the front of his helmet. “Now.” It didn’t even seem to acknowledge her, going over to the downed shuttle. “Kaidan!” The bangs as it slammed him against the shuttle - once, twice, a third time - rocked through her and she watched as it cast him aside carelessly.

Sarah opened fire as it charged, bullets pinging off its metal form before she placed one between its eyes. The mech dropped instantly and she ran over to Kaidan’s still form as the Normandy came in close, the back hatch opening.

“No, no, come on.” She said, turning his head to look at her. His helmet was almost crushed, shape of a hand imbedded in the metal. “Kaidan?” His eyes were open but unfocused, “Come on, Alenko. Look at me.” She tapped the side of his helmet lightly and his eyes went to her, focusing on her for a moment, tears filling them before they closed. “No! Kaidan, open your eyes! Come on, Kaidan, open your damn eyes!” He was still breathing, but one check of her omni-tool told her he was fading fast. “James! Grab the bot! We need to get out of here!” Taking his arm, she hauled him over her shoulder, carrying him to the Normandy and up the ramp as Reapers descended on the planet.


	19. Chapter 19

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I don't own Mass Effect

James stood outside the medbay, looking in on Sarah sitting by Kaidan’s bedside, holding his hand, the back of it pressed to her cheek. After a moment she got up, setting his hand back on the gurney and left the medbay.

“Hey.” He said, getting her attention and she looked at him quickly, then away, sniffling slightly as she wiped at her eyes.

“Hey.” She said back, clearing her throat thickly and he went to her, seeing her red eyes.

“How’s the Major?” He asked and she sniffled again.

“Hanging in there.” She said, “We’re uh...headed to the Citadel, he needs more medical attention than we can give him here.”

“Yeah, Doc told me.” James said, “Also something about a BFG.”

“Pretty much, yeah.” She said with a ghost of a smile, “Hackett wants us to bring it to the Council, get help building it and for Earth.”

“Think they’ll listen?” He asked.

“Based on prior experience?” She gave a humorless snort, “Probably not.”

“You and the Major,” He started, “You were um...close?”

“Once upon a time.” She said, “Not so much anymore.”

“What happened?”

“I died.” She said simply and he made a sound.

“Yeah, that’ll do it.” She gave a small laugh at that.

“We’re just different people now.” Sarah said, clearing her throat again.

“Sarah, come here.” He opened his arms to her, twitching his fingers at her.

“James, I--”

“Don’t argue with me, come here.” She stepped into him and he folded his arms around her, holding her to his chest, a hand to the back of her head as he felt her arms come around his waist. “The Major is going to be fine.”

“But what if he’s not? What if he--”

“Don’t think like that.” He said, “He’s going to be fine.” She took a deep breath and let it out slowly, sinking into his embrace and he pressed his lips to her hair before she pulled away from him.

“We’re going to be at the Citadel soon, we should get cleaned up.” She said, sniffling again, “No need to scare the normals.”

“The crew showers _are_ right down the hall.” He said and smiled as he got his intended reaction: her laugh.

“Tempting, Vega.” She said, still smiling at him, though it was weak, as she made her way to the elevator. “But I have my own Quarters. Perks of being me.”

“Must be nice!” He called after her and heard her laugh again right before the elevator doors closed.

Sarah stood under the spray, the hot water sliding down her skin, steam fogging up the small bathroom. Every part of her ached, even her scalp hurt as she washed her hair with the crappy Alliance issued shampoo. She’d pick up better toiletries on the Citadel, granted the Alliance had remembered to unfreeze her accounts upon her reinstatement. She set about washing the dirt and sweat from her skin, feeling as if the sand from Mars was coating her, even though she knew it wouldn’t have gotten past her suits seals. They had gone right from Earth to Mars and she was _tired_ , but she knew her day wasn’t over yet. Still had the Council and all their bullshit to deal with, and Kaidan…

She hadn’t been fast enough, hadn’t been paying close enough attention. She shouldn’t have gone to see if James was okay, should have trusted that he was given the shuttles design, should’ve…

When the shuttle had slammed to a stop on the rooftop, her heart lurched, images of James pinned in his seat by wreckage, unable to get free flashed across her mind. Chest crushed by a broken consul, intake valves on his helmet damaged making him unable to breathe. The crash hadn’t been that bad, the Cerberus shuttle had taken most of the damage, but her mind always liked to jump to the worst possible scenario. There had been a sigh of relief as he stepped from the shuttle, but it had quickly been replaced with anger at his reckless attitude.

A shuddering sigh shook her chest and she leaned against the shower wall, her forearms pressed against the metal and her head in her hands. She missed her friends. Jack, Kasumi, Samara, even Mordin and Grunt. She missed Thane, dear god did she miss Thane. While she didn’t have a Drell’s memory, she could still recall the feel of his lips sliding over the back of her neck, the whispered _“Siha”_ in her ear. Tingles passed over her skin in a wave as she remembered how his hands felt as they moved over her body. She had gotten used to cool water showers when she was with him, as steam aggravated his already sensitive lungs. The feel of him pressing against her back, his delicately scaled lips that were still somehow soft against her shoulder. Sometimes they made love in the shower, the water coursing around them, other times he just held her.

She allowed herself to get lost in the memory for a moment, the feel of his lithely muscular frame against her back, his arms around her waist and his mouth pressed against her neck, her head titled to the side to allow him easier access. Turning in his arms, she kissed him, her own arms encircling his neck as she molded herself against him, feeling his moan against her lips. Her back met the cool metal, his hand sliding down her side to her thigh to bring her leg around his waist, the feel of him hard and thick against her stomach making her shiver against him. He changed, his chest becoming broad and heavily muscled, five fingers kneading into the muscle of her thigh. Opening her eyes, she looked into James’ hazel hues, her eyes closing again as he bent his head to kiss her, his arm around her waist lifting her higher, her legs hitching over his narrow hips as his scarred lips dragged over her collarbone.

“Commander.” She snapped out of the dream at the sound of Joker’s voice over the comms. Had she really fallen asleep in the shower? Guilt hit her immediate and strong and her eyes closed tight as she breathed through the pain in her chest.

“What is it, Joker?” She asked as she hit the shut off for the water, her voice sounding tight even to her.

“We’re coming up on the Citadel, a med team is standing by for Kaidan.”

“Got it. Don’t waste any time he might not have.”


	20. Chapter 20

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I don't own Mass Effect

There was a sense of...wrongness on the Citadel. Like it wasn't quite real. Everything was too bright, too calm, too sterile of what was happening out there. It was like they had entered a pocket universe where the Reapers weren't invading and everything was business as usual. Udina and the Council were expecting her, but they could wait, she wanted to check on Kaidan, though she doubted he would be conscious.

Turning off the Sirta terminal after purchasing a medigel upgrade for her suit and a little something for later, she went to go to the front desk, aiming to ask where Kaidan was.

"Commander." She turned at the familiar voice, a small smile perking at her lips as she saw the older woman.

"Karin, what're you doing here?" She asked, going over to Normandy's previous Doctor.

"I heard there had been an altercation on Mars and that someone was gravely injured. Truth be told, I expected it to be _you."_

"Gee, thanks."

"Given your propensity for rushing headlong into life threatening danger, do you really blame me?"

"Nah, I guess not. How is Kaidan doing?" She asked, her hands sliding into her pockets of the new Alliance hoodie she picked up before coming to the hospital, the old one stuffed in a waste bin. The fabric was still stiff and smelled of preservatives, the price tag torn off and shoved into one of the pockets.

"Very well, all things considered. Dr. Michel is his primary and he couldn't be in better hands. Are you on your way to see him? He's not awake."

"I just wanted to check in on him. Be a sitcom and give him a bedside pep talk, you know how it is." She said and Karin smiled.

"That I do."

"So what have you been up to?"

"Admiral Hackett has me doing R and D in a lab on Shalta Wards."

"Sounds boring, get your ass to the Normandy. Docking bay D24." She said with a smile and Chakwas reached out, squeezing her arm gently.

"Thank you, Commander. I'll go pack my things right now." Sarah watched her go, her smile turning a little devious. She didn't tell her that Joker was still aboard, she'd figure it out. The sound of a French accent reached her ears and she turned, seeing Dr. Michel speaking to a nurse.

"Commander Shepard." She said, giving her a warm smile as she approached. "How are you?"

"Honestly? I'm a little tired."

"Commander."

"Ok, I'm a little...exhausted."

"Trouble sleeping?"

"Does five minutes count?"

"Commander!"

"Okay, okay! I get it! Not why I'm here, anyway." Sarah said, holding up her hands in surrender.

"You're here for Major Alenko?" She asked and she nodded.

"How is he?" Sarah asked.

"His vitals are strong so I am hopeful. The trauma was severe, but I expect him to make a full recovery." Michel said, "He's not conscious, but you may go see him, if you wish. He's right down the hall in intensive care."

"Thank you, Dr. Michel."

"Of course." Michel said, "And Shepard, get some sleep."

"I will...eventually." Sarah said as she moved away from her, walking down the hall, a feeling of trepidation coming over her as she neared Kaidan's room. She could see him through the glass wall, laying very still on the hospital bed. They had stripped him of his armor and under armor, his chest bare under the harsh lighting.

Taking a deep breath, she went into the room, the door closing behind her. The room was quiet, almost too quiet, the sounds of the hospital blocked out. His normally tawny skin was pale, the bruises on his face stark in comparison. Only then did she notice the gray hairs at his temples and she wondered if a few of those were because of her.

"Hey, Kaidan." She said, her voice low. "I don't know if you can hear me, but you can't boot my ass out so I guess I'm just going to make a fool of myself. I missed you. A lot. This past year hasn't been the greatest, for both of us it seems and I just...I missed you. You're one of my best friends and I know we haven't always agreed with one another, but I thought you should know that. I missed watching you kick ass, Alenko. Now all we need is Garrus and we got the band back together." Her small laugh sounded weak even to her, "Get better, Kaidan. Could sure use you on the Normandy. No, you don't have a choice. Yes, that's an order. I don't care if you technically outrank me now." She turned to leave, jumping slightly at the nurse standing there with an amused smile, her face warming slightly. "Don't tell him I said any of that."

"No, ma'am."

Sarah left the room as the nurse began to take Kaidan’s vitals, and she was about to head back to the elevator when she stopped, looking at the man standing not that far away from her, looking at her. Nurses and doctors milled around him without a care, moving around him almost instinctively, as if he wasn’t actually there. A spot of dark and stillness among the bright lights and flurry of people. He was dressed the same as she remembered, his hands clasped behind his back.

He finally moved, his hands going to his sides and she walked into his arms, sighing as they came around her.

“Siha.” He whispered in her ear, his arms tightening around her, “When I heard Earth had been attacked, I had no way of knowing if you had escaped. The thought of you dead…” He buried his face in her neck, the act made easier by the fact that they were similar in height.

“Thane.” She breathed, the leather of his coat creaking under her hands as she held onto him. Sarah felt his hand on the side of her face and she looked at him, his big black eyes with their dark green irises moving over her face as if he couldn’t quite seem to believe that she was here. His eyes stayed open even as he leaned into her, her own closing as he pressed his lips to hers. They shivered against each other as they kissed, breathing each other in as if they were starved of air. His hand slid to the back of her neck, bared by the tucked braid she had put her hair into to keep it out of the way while it dried.

His lips parted hers, his tongue dipping into her mouth and a small moan escaped between them as she accepted him, her head tilting to the side for a deeper angle, her tongue sliding against his.

Thane broke away just as her chest was starting to burn from lack of oxygen, his eyes darting to the side and a small chuckle escaping his lips, giving her a small smile.

“What?” she asked, breathing heavily and somewhat dazed.

“We have acquired an audience.” He said and she looked around them, seeing some of the nurses and doctors watching them with smiles on their faces.

“Oh dear god.” She said, her forehead meeting his shoulder as her face flamed and he chuckled again, pressing his lips to the side of her hair.

“Shall we talk, Siha?” He asked and she nodded, pulling away from him and taking his hand in her own, her ring finger tucked against her palm to accommodate for his conjoined fingers, something that took them a bit to figure out in the beginning of their relationship.

Walking into the waiting area, they took a seat facing the window overlooking the Presidium, Thane giving her one of his small smiles as she curled up sideways in his lap, head against his shoulder. Lacing an arm around her waist, he pressed a kiss to her forehead as he palmed her thigh.

“What are you doing here?” Sarah asked, looking at him and his smile dimmed somewhat.

“I am in the final stages of Kepral’s Syndrome and require daily medical care.” He said and she curled more on his lap. “I am sorry, Siha.”

“Don’t be.” She said, “There’s nothing you can do about it.”

“I am causing you pain.”

“We always knew this day would come, Thane. That we couldn’t be together for very long.” Sarah said, her voice tightening.

“That we did.” He said with a sigh, “I only wish we could have had more time.”

“Me too.” She said and his slid along her leg as his arms tightened around her.

“Siha, I…felt something in your kiss.” He said, as if not sure that was how he should word it.

“What do you mean?” Sarah asked, taking her head from his chest to look at him, a furrow appearing between her brows.

“I feel it now with the way you press yourself against me.”

“Thane, I--“

“It is guilt, Siha.” He said gently and she looked away from him. “Sarah?”

“There’s this Lieutenant on the Normandy, he was my guard while I was on lockdown on Earth. We became close during that time.” Sarah said, a pit forming in her chest as she spoke.

“Have you slept with him?” Thane asked, though he didn’t sound angry or accusatory, more curious.

“No!” She exclaimed, “I would never hurt you like that, Thane!”

“Siha, these are my last days.”

“I know that.”

“Then you should not feel guilt over having feelings for this Lieutenant.”

“But I—“

“Sarah, I want you to be happy when I am gone. More than that, I want you to _let_ yourself be happy. It will hurt to think of you with another man, but you need to prepare yourself for my passing, and that means letting me go.” Thane said and she looked away from him as tears filled her eyes.

“Thane…”

“Is he a good man?”

“Yes.”

“Does he make you happy?”

 _“You_ make me happy.”

“Answer the question please.”

“Yes.”

“Then allow yourself to be with him, allow my words to dissuade you of your guilt, and should the moment come, allow yourself to love him.” Thane said and she shifted so she was sitting on his thighs, hands holding the back of the chair as she looked down at him. “My time grows short, Siha, I would not want you to spend the rest of your years feeling sorrow and pain at my loss. I would not want you to spend them alone. I do, however, have but one request.”

“Name it.”

“I wish to meet him.” Thane said, “Not immediately of course, I know you have business elsewhere, but sometime soon, bring him here so I may look upon him and judge him for myself.”

“I will.” Sarah said and bent her head to kiss the dark mark on his forehead, feeling his lips at her throat. “I need to go, the Council is expecting me.” She slid off his lap at that, getting to her feet.

“Then go, Siha, I will be here when you return.” Taking his hand in her own, he kissed the back of it. Sarah left the hospital, taking one last look at him sitting in front of the window before the elevator doors closed, taking her to the Council.


	21. Chapter 21

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I don't own Mass Effect

The Council stared down at her from their podium and she stared right back at them, daring them to say something, anything. Liara was standing next to her on the presenters’ platform, but she might as well have been invisible, for all the acknowledgement she had been giving.

“So, how’s it going?” Shepard asked and received stony looks in return. “Thought so. So you know that threat I’ve been warning you about for the last three fucking years. The “Reapers”?” She said, her hands coming up as she made air quotes, looking directly at the Turian Ambassador, Sparatus, as she did so, his mandibles twitching in response. “Guess who decided to drop in from Dark Space.”

“Commander Shepard, we are well aware of the--” the Asari Councilor Tevos started.

“Save it, Tevos.” Sarah said, cutting her off. “You should have fucking listened to me and you damn well know it, but it’s too late for that. I don’t expect an apology from the three of you, I expect the Reapers to wave the white flag before that would ever happen.”

“Commander Shepard,” The Salarian Councilor Valern said, “There was simply not enough evidence three years ago to suggest that the Reaper Sovereign was anything more than a Geth construct.”

“You could have, I don’t know, _trusted my word as a Spectre._ But no, instead you decided to call me deluded and insane. Way to make me feel like part of the team, guys.” Sarah said and sighed, “But saying “I told you so”, while gratifying to some degree, is not why I’m here. I would have loved to have been wrong all this time, I would have shrugged and accepted it, maybe had a glass of wine to celebrate, but now billions of people are dying every minute because I was right, and now you know it and I am sorry. I wish to god, the goddess, and the spirits that I was wrong.” There was a pause where no one said or did anything. “But before Udina has me sniped from the rafters, let’s get down to business, shall we? We need your help, _Earth_ needs your help, anything you can give us.”

“Commander Shepard, without a plan--” Sparatus started.

“Oh I didn’t come to this little show and tell with nothing to show. Take it away, Liara.”

“Councilors, we have a plan, a blueprint for a Prothean weapon of massive size and scale, capable of untold levels of destruction.” Sarah tuned out after that, tech was more Liara’s expertise than hers, but she caught the gist of it. The Protheans started building the device, but were not able to finish it, not only did they run out time before they went extinct, but they were missing a key component that actually made the thing work, something called “The Catalyst”. She tuned back in at the end of the presentation and was not encouraged by the looks the Council was giving them.

“Commander Shepard--” Here is comes, “The sad, unavoidable truth is while the Reapers focus their assault on Earth, we can--Commander Shepard!” She had turned, throwing up a dismissive wave over her shoulder as she walked off the platform and down the stairs. They were never going to listen, that much was obvious.

Udina walked into his office, stopping in his steps at the person standing on the balcony, staring out over the Presidium.

“Shepard.” he said and she looked at him over her shoulder.

“Councilor.”

“How did you get in my office?” He asked, joining her on the balcony, knowing he had put a security lock on the door after he had left it.

“Wasn’t that hard, actually. Your password is the name of your childhood pet and your date of birth. Rookie mistake, Udina. It should only be unlocked by your omni-tool signature.” She shrugged, “At least that’s what I do.”

“I’m not going to ask how you knew that information--”

“Good choice.”

“And expect to be able to sleep at night. What are you doing here, Shepard?”

“Figured you might have wanted to talk to me after what happened in the Council meeting.”

“Yes, you walking away like that didn’t help matters.”

“Yeah, well, they had already made up their minds before we had even got there.” Sarah said and he sighed.

“Yes, they did. It doesn’t matter that you saved their asses when Saren attacked or that humanity has a seat on the Council, we will always be second class, less than, to the other races.” Udina said and she gave a humorless snort.

“Oh, I don’t know. I think we rank higher than the Vorcha, but just barely.”

“That gives the Vorcha entirely too much credit.” They turned, seeing Sparatus walk into the office and she snorted, shaking her head.

“Sparatus.” She said in greeting.

“Shepard.” He said back, “I have a proposal that--”

“Sparatus! We barely know each other!” The Turian sighed, his head hanging for a moment before he picked it back up again, looking at her.

“That I think will benefit us both.” He finished, looking very not amused by her sense of humor. “A War Summit is being called of all the Council races, to garner support and encourage a cooperative effort against the Reapers.”

“Fascinating, what’s the catch?” Shepard asked.

“The _catch_ is that the one who called the Summit cannot attend. Primarch Fedorian of Palaven, he’s a good man and he’s stranded on an outpost on Menae. You’d like him, Shepard, he’s a man of action.” Sparatus said and she made an understanding sound.

“You want us to go get him for this Summit.” Shepard said and the Turian nodded.

“The Normandy’s stealth systems could land, retrieve him, and bring him back without detection from the Reapers. Do this, Shepard, and you’ll have Turian support for Earth and this...device of yours.”

“Councilor Sparatus, you have a deal.” She said and they shook on it.

“Excellent, Commander, I look forward to your report once you retrieve the Primarch. Granted, of course, you don’t hang up on us mid call again.” He said and she gave him a cheeky smile.

“Oh, come on! It’ll be just like old times!”


	22. Chapter 22

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I don't own Mass Effect.

She didn't announce it, but she didn't need to. The feel of the room changed when Commander Shepard walked into it. Presence, his abuela used to call it. He watched her deal with some press out of the corner of his eye and it seemed, at one point, she was going to deck the reporter.

He continued to look out the window over the Presidium, arms crossed over his chest and feet stanced.

“Lieutenant.” He heard and turned to face her.

“Commander.” He said and looked her over, “Damn, Sarah, you look--” He was going to say _“exhausted”_ , but he had reached for her as he did so, stopping when she took a single step back. There was a flash of pain at her sudden rejection, his hand going to the back of his neck in what he hoped looked like a casual gesture.

“Press.” She said, moving her head at the reporter still standing in the entryway, and James spared the woman a look. She was watching them closely, her video drone trained on them, though it's light wasn’t lit. “Khalisah Bint-Sinan Al’Jilani. I’ve dealt with her before and I think I managed to talk her down from her war path, but she and I don’t get along so I wouldn’t put it past her to look for something to slam me with in the news.”

“Gotcha.” He said, “So keep my hands to myself?”

“Oh, I didn’t say that, Vega.” She countered with a grin, “Just around someone I’ve made look like a fucking idiot the last two times she’s interviewed me. She seems like the kind of person that would harbor a petty grudge.”

He didn’t know how she did it, but she managed to make a hoodie, jeans, and dirty sneakers look sexy. She had taken her hair down from the braid he had last seen it in and it had dried in soft golden waves that ended halfway down her back. _Dios,_ she was beautiful.

“What?” he asked, realizing she had asked him something while he had been staring at her and a slow smile tugged at the corners of her mouth.

“I said ‘are you enjoying your time on the Citadel’?”

“I’ve been to the Citadel before, but never up here on the Presidium.”

“So how is it up here with the elite of the galaxy?” She said it like she didn’t really think of it that way, her smile turning teasing.

“It’s all fake. None of it is real. They rush around pretending everything is fine, refusing to believe that things are going to hell, and until that hell is here, they’ll continue to ignore it.”

“Damn, Vega.” She said after a brief moment, “That was almost deep.”

“I have my moments.” He said with a shrug.

"We should probably get back to the Normandy. Let's walk, it's a nice one." Shepard said and they headed for the elevator together that would take them to the Commons. Once the doors were closed, James laced his arm around her shoulders, his hurt from before vanishing as she leaned against him, her arm sliding around his waist.

The synthetic sun on the Citadel provided light but no warmth and he missed the sun of California, the rays beating down on his skin as he walked along the beach. Of course, those beaches were probably destroyed now by the Reapers, but he could dream. They fell into step with one another, his arm still over her shoulders and hers around his waist as they walked through the Commons. It seemed they were taking the long way, but that was fine by him, he knew the Normandy was still undergoing retrofits and he wanted to spend time with her where they weren't getting shot at.

The gentle smell of her hair filled his nose whenever he pointed something out to her, leaning down to whisper in her ear, her laughter at some things he said almost musical. If this had been a date, he might have stopped them in a spot with a view and made a move on her, but this wasn't a date, though it sure felt like it at times when her fingers moved over his waist through his t-shirt, or her hip bumped against his leg in a way that couldn't have been an accident.

Her omni-tool beeped at her and they stopped as she looked at it, the interface coming up.

“What’s up?” He asked.

“Council reinstated my Spectre status. Figured they’d get around to it eventually.” She said, the display vanishing.

“What does that mean?”

“It means, Lieutenant Vega that I have resources and information available to me that previously weren't.” Sarah explained, “It also means I no longer answer to the Alliance brass as I now work directly for the Council. I know they won’t interfere, they want the Reapers gone as much as anybody, but there it is.”

“Don’t answer to the Alliance, huh?”

“Technically.”

“So all those rules, regulations…”

“No longer apply.” She said, “I’m still technically a Commander in the Alliance Military, just not sort of a part of the Alliance Military anymore. It’s complicated. I am, but I’m not. While we’re here, though.” She pulled away from him then, going over to a banking terminal and punching in her information, pressing her hand to the screen. There was a moment before the terminal beeped and a slim card slid out a slot. Grabbing it, she tucked it into the back pocket of her jeans but he managed to look over her shoulder before the screen went dark.

“Holy shit, Commander, you’re loaded.” He said and she shrugged.

“Cerberus gave me a _lot_ of money when I was fighting the Collectors and I may...have...also had a friend siphon a few million credits from their accounts a little bit at a time. It was distributed to various members of my team and a few alien charities.”

“You gave Cerberus money to alien charities.”

“Yep.” Sarah said, looking very pleased with herself. “A few relief organizations, a few clinics on Omega, this medical research lab on Kahje that’s trying to develop a cure for a congenital illness some of the Drell there had developed due to the environment. Divided up, it wasn’t a lot, but every little bit helps, right? What? Why are you looking at me like that?” He didn't say anything but wrapped his arm around her shoulders and pulled her close, pressing a kiss to the top of her head. "Okay, then. Weirdo."


	23. Chapter 23

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I don't own Mass Effect

There were a couple people still away when they got back on board and Shepard pulled away from his side, using the time to deal with the requisitions she had set up. It was almost a physical shift, to see her going from _Sarah_ to _Commander Shepard._ Despite still wearing civvies, she might as well have been in dress blues the way the junior officers reacted to her orders. James had taken over as Armsmaster, coordinating weapons and regular thermal clip shipments to the cargo bay, along with a variety of explosives and heavy arms. He had a feeling they were going to need it if they were going to dealing with Cerberus and Reaper forces both in this war. He caught her eye before heading down to the shuttle bay, her green hues sparkling at him and one corner of her lips tugging upwards before she turned her attention back to the Corporal in front of her and was all business again.

“Mr. Vega!” He heard when he got down to the shuttle bay, a large smile splitting his face when he saw the speaker.

“Esteban!”

“I heard you made it off Earth!” Steve said as the two men came together in a brotherly hug, “How are you? You okay?”

“Yeah, I got a couple more scars to add to my charm, but I’m good.” James said as they parted, shrugging a shoulder. “What about you? Were you on board the whole time?”

“It was crazy, one minute everything is calm, the next every alarm in the ship goes off and the engines power up. EDI corralled us into the Engineering Deck saying that it would be the safest area until things were sorted out. Wouldn’t take no for an answer. Then she sealed off the drive core and locked the entire deck down, trapping us all in there. Didn’t let us out until we reached the Citadel.”

“We could have used you on Mars.”

“Don’t remind me. You are not allowed to even _look_ at the new shuttle, you understand me?”

“Oh, come on! I didn’t really have a lot of options!”

“Whatever, Mr. Vega. Just leave the shuttle piloting to me from now on, got it?”

“Yeah, yeah, I got it.”

“Vega...James... _Commander Shepard._ ”

“ _Dios mio_ , I know!” James exclaimed in an excited whisper.

“You had quite the uh...soft spot for her on Fehl Prime. Does she live up to the legend?” Steve asked with a grin.

“Esteban, she’s a _badass_. You should have seen her on Mars, at the Beta Site…”

“I _knew_ you gave her a gun!”

“Hey, I didn’t give her a gun, I let her _keep_ a gun, big difference.” James countered, “How do you even know about that?”

“Someone leaked the report after she got to Earth.” Steve said with a dismissive wave of his hand.

“Steve, she saved my ass.” James said and Steve gave him a confused look. “The official report said that the security feed was disabled by the Batarians? It wasn’t. Fuck, we _used_ the security cameras when we were retaking the facility. She wiped the feed and the backup. I don’t how she did it, either. Probably some back-tracing, self-deleting, virus...thing.”

“Insightful.”

“Tech isn’t my thing.”

“Have you asked her about it?”

“Fuck, no. She has bigger things to worry about now.”

“Very true.” Steve said, “So you and I are going to maintaining this armory _together_ , Mr. Armsmaster. Try not to leave a mess around? The last thing I need is another scar from tripping over a crate of thermal clips again.”

“It healed.” James said with a shrug.

“Get out of my face, go work in your area.” Steve said, pushing him away with a gesture as he went over to the shuttle.

James quickly went to work on getting his workstation how he liked it. Within a few hours he had crates lining the sides, a couple tarps acting as makeshift walls and giving privacy to the cot he put to one side in case he felt like crashing down here instead of in the crew quarters. His weight set was against one wall, but he needed to calibrate the settings, as every ship's’ artificial gravity differed slightly. Thermal clips and mods littered his work desk as he took apart the battle rifle Shepard had picked up on Mars.

“Hey Procurement Officer!” He called over, “Any chance we can get some more of these Vindicators?”

“Only if I feel like making shady backroom deals with merc groups from the Terminus Systems.” Steve said and they shared a look, Steve giving out an annoyed sound as he went over to a terminal. “I’ll see what I can do.”

“Nice.”

“Commander,” He heard and looked up from his work station, “Shuttle Pilot Lieutenant Steve Cortez, ma’am, I have information on our procurement lines.”

“Slow down, Lieutenant.” Sarah’s amused voice reached him at his workstation and he looked over his shoulder, seeing her standing in front of Steve. She had switched out the Alliance hoodie for an N7 one, her hands in the pockets. Setting the mods aside, he hopped up, grabbing onto the bar overhead and began to do pull-ups, the muscles of his back and shoulders bunching and cording under his t-shirt. He wasn’t trying to impress her, no sir. He half listened to their conversation on supply lines, the armory, and the new Kodiak shuttle. “James.” He looked over mid-pull up to see her standing just off to the side, leaning back against a cargo crate.

“Hey, Commander.”

“You certainly...took over this part of the shuttle bay.” She said, looking around at his additions.

“Just like home.” He said, grunting slightly as he started another set. He saw her eyes move over him from the corner of his, a brow arching as she watched him. “Did you want to talk about something? Or are you just looking?”

“Can’t do both? It’s almost impressive.” She asked and he felt the back of his neck warm at her tone. Dropping from the bar, he rotated his neck that had gone tight until it popped.

“Oh come on, Lola. You gonna hurt me like that?” He asked as he moved close to her, looking down at her as his hands came up, pressing against the crate on either side of her, “ _Almost_ impressive?”

“Okay, maybe a little more than ‘almost’, but not by much.” She said, a challenge in her eyes.

“Think you can do better?”

“What do you think, James?” Sarah asked, one of her hands coming up to lay on his chest.

“You’re good, don’t get me wrong, but you are kind of...tiny.” He said, looking her over in an obvious way. She tugged at the neck of his t-shirt before sliding out around him, going to the bar. He turned and watched, his back against the crate and his arms crossed over his chest as she looked up at it, taking off her hoodie, revealing the dark t-shirt underneath. He had had to jump to reach the bar, and she was almost a foot shorter than he was. She jumped, but was only able to skim her fingertips against the metal. Sarah did this a few more times, her annoyance evident before she turned to look at him.

“Asshole, will you stop laughing and help me up?” She asked and he wiped the tears from his eyes, trying to catch his breath.

“Hold still, Lola.” He said still chuckling and went in front of her, wrapping his hands around her waist. “Ready?” He lifted her easily and she grabbed onto the bar.

“Oh, Lieutenant Vega, where have you been all my life? I’m all a flutter from your masculine strength.” She said and he snorted. She pulled herself up with minimal effort, lowering back down slowly and doing it again. “What’s your record?”

“One eighty-three.” He said as he watched her, taking note of her form, noticing how she favored her right shoulder slightly.

“Bullshit. Maybe in low grav.” She said and hung there.

"You giving up already? I only counted fifty." He said with a grin and she shot him a look.

"Help me down, I'll injure myself if I just drop." She said and he wrapped his hands around her again. She let go of the bar and he slowed her fall, letting go once she was on steady footing. "James, before this goes any farther, I need to get something out of my system."

"What do you--" his words were cut off when she pulled him down even as she went up on her toes, their lips coming together in the middle. There was a moment of shock before his arms wound around her, returning the kiss with equal fervor, hands pressing against her back. She felt so small in his arms, but he could feel her strength as she dominated the kiss, her fingers moving through the shorn hair at the back of his head. His heart pounded in his ears and he crushed her to him, groaning against her lips as she molded against him perfectly. Heat spread through his body, settling in the pit of his stomach as her lips parted his, her tongue skimming over his bottom lip and he met it with his own, feeling her shiver as she tasted him, her tongue sliding fluidly against his.

She ripped away from him with a gasp, looking up at him with darkened eyes, her lips kiss bruised and her face flushed, chest heaving as she fought to catch her breath. The look she gave him was filled with desire and something else he couldn't quite decipher before she turned and walked away to the elevator, grabbing her hoodie on the way.

"Did it work?" He called after her, a small tremor in his voice.

"Nope, made it worse." She said right before the elevator doors closed, taking her from the shuttle bay.

"Holy fuck." Steve said, looking at him with wide eyes.


	24. Chapter 24

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Menaaaaeeeee

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I don't own Mass Effect

Palaven was burning. Even from orbit they could see as the Reapers decimated the strongest military force in the galaxy, tearing through their line as if it wasn’t even there. If they were able to do this to the Turians, she didn’t even want to think about what was happening to Earth while she played nice with politicians.

Sarah tried pinging Garrus's omnitool the moment they were in range, but received no answer and she couldn't help but suspect the worst: that he was dead somewhere down on that planet and there was nothing she could have done to help him. Liara made quick work with the comm tower as she and James kept the waves of Husks from swarming it. Despite losing a friend, General Corinthus was level headed as they searched for who was going to be the next Primarch, but she didn't expect anything less from a Turian. They were nothing if not dependable. 

"Commander," the General's voice buzzed in her ear. "Come back to Command, we have a lead on who's the next Primarch."

"On my way General, just mopping up." She replied, her words punctuated by rifle fire as they were beset by another wave of Husks. "Everyone good?"

"Yes, Sarah." Liara said, ejecting the thermal clip from her sub machine gun.

"Hey, Lola, can you turn into one of these things from a bite?" James asked.

"It doesn't work like that, James. Why do you ask?"

"My shoulder is feeling a little funny is all."

"We'll have Chakwas take a look at it when we get back to the Normandy. Last thing we need is for you to come down with some horrible infection."

"Yeah, like Husk-Itis."

"That's really not how it works." Shepard said as they made their way back to Command. "General, please tell me you found someone."

"I've been speaking with Palaven Command, your companion was correct earlier, the Hierarchy is usually straightforward, but with so many dead or missing..." Corinthus let it trail off.

"General, I need a Primarch for this summit and I don't have the luxury of being picky. Just give me a name and I'll track him down."

"Don't worry, Shepard." She looked around the General at the voice, "We'll find you the Primarch."

"There's my Turian." Sarah said, a wide smile splitting her face.

"Shepard, it's good to see you in one piece." Garrus said as he stopped in front of her.

"Vakarian, Sir," Corinthus said, clearly at a loss. "I didn't see you arrive."

"At ease, General." Garrus said and Sarah looked back and forth between the two, an amused expression on her face.

"Sir? Someone went legit while I was on lockdown." Sarah said and he gave her the Turian version of a grin, his mandibles raising slightly.

"Well not everyone can just blow up a mass relay like you did."

"I didn't blow it up!" Sarah exclaimed, "I asteroid dropped it, there's a difference, and I still feel really bad about that so fuck you." She felt more than saw James come up behind her. "Lieutenant James Vega, Garrus Vakarian."

"Damn, Lola. You kept pace with this guy?" James asked and Garrus laughed.

"Took her a while to get there, but yes." Garrus said, "I'm still the better shot."

"Bullshit you are." She said defensively.

"Commander, I have a name." Corinthus said, "General Adrien Victus."

"Victus." Garrus said with a thoughtful sound, "You'll like him, he's inventive when it comes to strategy."

"Where is he?"

"Well, I was fighting alongside him this morning, but we had to split up. He could be anywhere on this moon." Garrus said and she turned to Corinthus.

"I'll see if I can raise him on comm."

"If you can, tell him to double time it back here."

"Give the new Primarch of Palaven an order?" Corinthus asked.

"Politely." Shepard added and he made an amused sound, going back to the communication terminal.

"Incoming Harvester!" James called out and the soldiers opened fire as the creature flew overhead, it's screech making the air tremble. Their bullets seemed to do little to nothing to it as it flew off towards the airfield, landing briefly and then taking off again.

"General Corinthus, keep trying to track down the new Primarch, we'll go take care of whatever that thing just dropped off." Shepard said and her comm buzzed in her ear.

"Uh, Commander?"

"Little busy, Joker, what's up?"

"The Normandy is going to batshit and we can't figure out what's going on. I can raise EDI, either, the AI Core is completely locked down."

"Liara," Shepard said, turning to her, "Get back to the Normandy and see what's going on. We may need to make a quick getaway."

"On it, Shepard." The Asari took off for the shuttle.

"Garrus, I'm down a man, feel like stepping up to the plate?"

"You even have to ask?" Garrus said, taking his rifle from his back.

"I love my Turian." She said, leaning against him with a smile.

"Commander Shepard, a word before you go?" Corinthus asked and she spared him a look.

"You guys go ahead, I'll play catch up and find a nest to roost in." She said and they both hesitated a moment before taking off for the airfield. "What's up, General?"

"It's Vakarian, he..."

"What's wrong with Garrus?"

"Nothing is wrong with him, it's just...if Victus dies on this moon, Vakarian is the Primarch. Palaven Command informed me when I inquired about the line of succession." Corinthus said, "I've always found it fascinating that humans can do that with their eyebrows."

"Garrus is next in line for the Primacy?" Her surprise was evident in her voice.

"Yes."

"Does he know that?"

"Not that I'm aware of."

"Shit. Well he's really not going to like being Primarch, so I’ll make sure Victus stays alive." Sarah said, taking her Valiant from her back.

"Of course, Commander. I just thought you should be aware of who is next in line, just in case."

"Thank you, General." She said and was about to leave Command when she made a sound. "Ooh, Mantis!" She exclaimed happily and picked it up, checking the clips. Going back up the ramp she set her Valiant on a table, pulling a soldier on guard duty over by his cowl. "This is an N7 Valiant. Anything happens to her and I'm holding you responsible. Do not lose her." She instructed him and took off running towards the airfield.

"Do you think she'd mind if I..." The soldier reached for the rifle but stopped at the look Corinthus was giving him. "Yes, Sir."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Comments are always lovely~!


	25. Chapter 25

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Menae Maddness Continues

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I don't own Mass Effect

_Opportunistic bastards._ That was the only thing going through his head as he and Vakarian held out against Reaper forces that looked a hell of a lot like Turians while simultaneously fending off Husks. The Turian gave a shout and James turned, seeing a Husk latched onto him, trying to rip into his armor but before he could get a shot off, its head exploded in a mess of tech and gore. A Turian-Reaper coming out of a roll was blown back with a shot to the chest, crumpling to the rocky ground.

Casting a quick look at the barricade, he saw a soldier hand Sarah a thermal clip and he turned back to the approaching forces with a renewed concentration, pulling the trigger on his rifle in controlled bursts.

“I think we’re good here!” She called from the sniper’s nest, standing and bracing the butt of the rifle on her hip. “Let’s get back to--”

“They’re on the southern barricade!” The call went out and she hopped down from the nest as James and Garrus ran up the ramp that had lowered again. Sarah handed the Mantis off to a soldier as they ran through command.

“Valiant!” she called out and caught it as it was tossed to her, putting it in its restraining clips as she climbed the ladder to the mounted gun on the wall. Husks flowed over the terrain and the gun started up with a bass purr, her hands wrapping around the controls. James could feel it fire through his boots as she squeezed the triggers in bursts, taking out scores of Husks.

“Damn, Lola!” He yelled to her over the sounds of gunfire, “You make it look easy!”

“You keep complimenting me like this, Vega, I’m going to think you’re trying to start something!” she yelled back and he caught the smile on her face out of the corner of his eye.

“ _Me_ try to start something?” He asked, “No! Where would you get that idea?” A roar pierced the air as the last of the Husks fell and they went quiet.

“What was that?” Sarah asked.

“Holy fuck!” James exclaimed, “What is that thing?!” A mass of tech and organics came barreling towards them, straight for the barricade.

“Brace yourselves!” She tried to get off the gun, but the...whatever it was hit the metal and stone hard, causing her to tip forward. Shepard let out a short yell as she hit the ground and she barely scrambled out of the way as the thing came back for another pass, taking cover behind a rocky spire.

“Sarah!” Garrus called down, “Are you all right?”

“Yeah I’m fine!” She called back, though her voice was strained, pain radiating from her bad shoulder which, of course, she landed on. The pain lessened as the first aid VI in her suit injected her with painkillers and she came out from behind her cover, her hands at her sides, clenching and unclenching in fists as she popped her neck. It swung around, its synthetic eyes gleaming as it focused on her. The Turian’s were firing at it, but their rounds just bounced off it, not phasing it in the slightest. It started huffing, back feet kicking at the ground, reminding her very much of a bull about to charge.

“Sarah!” She heard, “Don’t you dare play rooster with that thing!”

“Rooster?” James asked and there was a brief pause, “Sarah! Don’t you dare play chicken with that thing!”

“Bawk!” She called back, bouncing on the balls of her feet. “Come on. Come on, ugly.” She whispered to herself as it continued to ramp up, “I’m right here. Easy target. _Come on._ ” Finally it charged, one hand tipped in razor sharp claws drawn back for a swipe and she dove out of the way at the last second, her tactical cloak activating before she came out of the roll, her form vanishing.

James watched as she vanished, his eyes searching the area, his breathing loud in his ears as he couldn’t find any trace of her. Nothing shifted, not the rocks, not the air, nothing, and he couldn’t help but think of the Ancient Roman Gladiators performing in the Colosseum with lions. Only this wasn’t Ancient Rome, and Shepard was _not_ a Gladiator. The brute circled the clearing, searching for its prey, its steps making the ground shake.

“Focus fire and aim your shots!” Garrus ordered and James hefted his rifle, keeping the trigger pulled as he fired on that thing, needing to take it down before it found her. She suddenly materialized mid-jump off an outcropping, landing on its back and making it give a mechanical roar. Her hand wrapped around one of the tech pieces coming from its back as she rode it, her jaw clenched. It slammed against a spire, trying to dislodge her, but she held on, dodging its’ claws as it tried to rip her from its’ back.

Her free hand came back, her omniblade materializing and with a shout, she buried it in the thick cords that took the place of a neck, almost severing them completely. It crumpled, hitting the ground hard and she rode it down, hopping from it’s back.

“Spirits.” James heard a Private next to him breath, “Is she single?” Both he and Garrus turned to look at him and the Private looked away quickly. “Nevermind.”

“Hey!” They both looked at her, “Get your asses down here! We have a Primarch to find!” It took them a bit longer to find a way down that wasn’t the direct route she took.

“You all right, Lola?” James asked when they were all on even plane again and she nodded.

“A bit bruised, but I’ll live.” She said, looking up at him with a reassuring smile.

“Why are you holding your arm like that?” He asked, also noticing the tightness around her eyes, the stiffness to her jaw.

“Tweaked my shoulder on the landing, I’m just waiting for the medi-gel to kick in. Hey, why don’t you scout out ahead for a few then come back?” She suggested, “I need to talk to Garrus about the new Primarch anyway.”

“Okay, Lola, I’ll be back.”

“Keep in radio contact.” She said as he walked off and he waved at her over his shoulder.

“Shepard?” Garrus asked and she turned to him.

“I need you to pop my shoulder back in.” Sarah said, pain creeping into her voice.

_“What?” ___

__“My shoulder got knocked out while I was playing rodeo, I need you to pop it back in again.” She repeated and he pressed his hand to his face._ _

__“Why me? You know I hate doing that. Why not ask the Lieutenant?”_ _

__“Because James will worry too much about hurting me and might do more harm than good. You know I can take it and you’ve done it before. So come on, before he comes back.” Sarah said, turning her back on him and straightening her arm the best she was able. “Waiting on you, Vakarian.”_ _

__“Spirits, fine.” He growled and wrapped one hand around her elbow, the other holding her shoulder. “I told you after the Collector Ship that I wasn’t doing this again.”_ _

__“Yeah, yeah, less talking more popping.” She said and he pulled her arm back a little, his hand tightening around her shoulder._ _

__“On three. Ready? One...two…” He did it on two, jerking back on her arm and pushing forward on her shoulder, the joint realigning with a crunch. To her credit, she didn’t yell out, but he did have to support her as she sagged a bit. “You all right?” He asked as he held her to him, stooping a bit to press his forehead to the back of her head._ _

__“I’m good. Medi-gel will kick in and I’ll be great.” She said, her hands on his arms._ _

__“Way’s clear for a few klicks.” James said as he came back, stopping at the sight of them. “Everything all right?”_ _

__“Yeah.” Shepard said with a smile, “My bird is just happy to see me.”_ _

__“Of _course_ I’m happy to see you, Shepard,” Garrus said as he pulled away from her, “I knew it was only a matter of time before you showed up. You usually do when shit goes to hell.”_ _

__“Yeah, and pull your plates out of the fire...again.”_ _

__“I don’t know what I’d do without my tiny human.” Garrus said, reaching over and ruffling her hair._ _

__“Get every Merc group on Omega after your ass and take a missile to the face, apparently.” Sarah said, batting his hand aside._ _

__“Is that how you got the…” James gestured to his own face and Garrus nodded. “Ow.”_ _

__“Yes and I don’t recommend it.” Garrus said and Sarah made an amused sound._ _

__“Come on, let's find the Primarch and get off this moon.” She said, taking her Vindicator from her back and they set off._ _

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Comments are always lovely~!


	26. Chapter 26

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I don't own Mass Effect

Menae had been a trip. James was unwinding down in the cargo bay, cleaning his rifle at his workstation. He could hear Cortez working on the shuttle behind him. Putting the Vindicator back together, he set it in the weapons rack and called out a farewell, getting onto the elevator to the crew level.

He knew Shepard had been in meetings since the new Primarch had come on board, so he hadn't seen her since they got back to the ship. The crew deck was mostly empty, the crew a skeleton team of who had been on board when they left Earth.

Heading for the lounge, the door opened and he saw Liara sitting there on one of the couches, her back to him.

“Hey, Doc, you seen--”

“Shh!” She hissed, cutting him off sharply and looked over her shoulder at him. “I apologize, but she hasn't been sleeping.” Her whisper was gentle and he moved around the couch, seeing Sarah laying with her head in the Asari’s lap. She was curled up, her hand resting near her face on Liara’s thigh, sound asleep as Liara wove her fingers through her hair. The scene was almost domestic and intimate, relaying even more of their history to him.

“You want me to…” The statement could have meant a couple different things, but she seemed to know what he was trying to say. 

“No, it's quite all right.” Liara said, “She’s comfortable and I don't wish to disturb her.” There must have been some kind of expression on his face because she gave him a gentle smile. “James, why don't you come see me in my office later? I'll let you know when and we can talk.”

“Oh...kay.” He said, somewhat confused, pausing before he turned and left the lounge, leaving Sarah to rest.

Later, Liara looked up as the door to her office next to the mess hall opened, James taking up most of the space.

“Come in.” She said, stepping away from the monitors lining the walls and he walked into the room, looking around with a low whistle.

“Nice spread.” He said and she gave him a small smile.

“It serves it's purpose.”

“You wanted to talk to me?” James asked, crossing his arms over his chest.

“Are you attracted to Sarah?” Liara asked and he cleared his throat at the sudden question.

“What do you mean?” He asked, shifting slightly.

“James, I may only be a hundred and nine--”

_“Only.”_

“But I'm not naive.” She said with a slow smile at the interruption. “I see the way you look at her, and I see how you are... conflicted.”

“I'm not--”

“You're wondering about the relationship between Sarah and myself. I've known her for far longer, been through so much with her. She and I have…history.” Liara said and he looked away with a nod.

“I get it.” James said, a sinking feeling forming in his chest. They had “history”, and based on the scene he had walked in on earlier, they were picking up where they left off. He never figured Sarah would be attracted to women, or Asari, but then he was hoping she was attracted to him. “I won't get between you two, and I'll back off.” He turned, going to leave the office.

“Lieutenant! James! Oh, Goddess…” He stopped, turning back to look at her. “It's not like that at all.” She said, her cheeks purpling slightly in a blush. “Sarah and I aren't...involved. We are simply...close. Goddess, it's difficult to explain. She and I shared consciousness twice while she was hunting Saren three year ago, but it wasn't sexual, it was merely...an exchange of information. My knowledge of the Protheans helped her process and understand the information she received from the Beacons.”

“Okay.” He said slowly, still not fully understanding.

“But that, and I believe the human term is, a door that swings both ways. She was in my mind as much as I was in hers. I can feel her, sometimes, like a shadow or an afterthought in the back of my mind. While the melding wasn't sexual it was highly intimate. Our...closeness is not one born of physical intimacy, but one born of knowing each other completely.” Liara said, “If it helps, I don't believe Sarah is attracted to Asari.”

“But Asari seem to be attracted to her.” James said, “I seen the looks she gets sometimes from the Asari on the Citadel, it's like she has a spotlight on her that only they can see.”

“Yes, well, Sarah exudes strength, confidence, intelligence and, I am not ashamed to admit, not a small amount of sex appeal.” Liara said, blushing again gently, “As base as this sounds, Asari are drawn to her because children with her would possess those qualities, making her quite desirable as a bond-mate.”

“Have you...you know...thought about it?” James asked and she gave an embarrassed chuckle, her blush intensifying making a wide smile pull across his face.

“Yes, I do admit that I have...entertained the thought of what it would be like to be with her in that way.” She admitted, “But as I've said, Sarah doesn't seem to be attracted to Asari. She does, however, seem to be attracted to you.” It was his turn to blush, heat creeping up the back of his neck.

“How do you um…”

“As I've said, I've been in her mind. Not recently, but I know her, I know the types of men she is attracted to. Though Thane was a surprise. I never thought she'd involve herself with a Drell.” Liara admitted and his brow furrowed slightly.

“Drell?” He asked.

“Oh Goddess. She hasn't told you about Thane.” She leaned to the side slightly, looking around him out the door. “Close the door. She's going to be angry with me for doing this, but you have the right to know. Especially if you intend on pursuing her.” Reaching behind him, he hit the control and the door slid closed, Liara going over to her terminal and typing into the inputs. Various pictures of the same Drell came up on the screen, mostly surveillance photos it seemed, some of them appearing to be recent. “Thane Krios.” She said, “An assassin trained by the Hanar under the Compact, sort of an agreement the Drell have with the Hanar for bringing some of them to Kahje.”

“How did they meet?” James asked, standing next to her, looking at the man whose name Sarah had breathed in her sleep all those weeks ago. He hadn't expected him to be an alien, if he were being honest, and certainly not so...alien looking.

“Sarah recruited him on Illium while she was gathering a team to go beyond the Omega 4 Relay.” Liara explained, “He is, by all accounts, the best assassin in the galaxy, having over two thousand confirmed kills to his name. In fact, she recruited him after she tracked him down on his way to a contract. Nassana Dantius.” After inputting a command, what looked like security footage came up on one of the screens and James watched as Thane dropped from the ceiling, killing several armed guards before killing an Asari with a point blank gunshot to the midsection, gently laying her down on the desk as she died.

“Damn.” He said when the footage ended.

“According to communications, their relationship began sometime after they met, and continued until she surrendered herself to the Alliance following the Alpha Relay incident.”

“Are they still together? I mean, it wouldn't be a good idea to step on the toes of an assassin.” James said, attempting to lighten some of the weight in his chest with humor.

“I honestly don't know. I know she still cares for him deeply, but there is...something, I don't know if I should…”

“Doc.”

“No, that is something she should tell you herself. It is not my place.” Liara said and the images vanished from the screen. “It's nothing” She paused, searching for the right words. “It's just complicated. Now go, I have work to do.”

“Fine, I'm gone.” He said, seeing that there was no use in trying to get any more information from her. Waving his hand over the sensor, the for opened and he left the office, hearing it close behind him as he walked away.

Heading back into the lounge, he stopped as he saw Sarah sitting on one of the couches, her back to the door. She looked over her shoulder at the sound of the door opening and he saw the corner of her lips perk slightly as she saw him.

“Hey.” She said and he went around the couch, seeing her with her legs curled under her, datapad in her hands.

“Hey.” He echoed and she scooted over slightly in a wordless invitation, even though there was plenty of room on the couch. He sat down next to her, looking over as she curled against his side, his arm draping across her shoulders. “You scared the hell out of me on Menae with that damn stunt you pulled with the Brute.”

“Consider it payback for Mars.” She said with a giggle.

“Lola…” He sighed, “You know what? No. Your nickname isn't Lola anymore.”

“Aww, I was starting to like Lola.”

“It's Loca now.” He said and she shifted slightly to look up at him.

“Loca?”

“Yeah, because you're fucking crazy.” He said and she laughed, making him smile. “We going to talk about it?”

“The fact that I'm apparently out of my mind? I thought that's what we were doing.”

“About that kiss you hit me with in the shuttle bay.”

“Ah, that.” Between raiding a Cerberus lab housing Reaper tech and then Menae, they hadn’t spoken about it, but it hadn't been the time or place to talk about how her heart had raced, her mind had swam, and heat had coursed through her veins. The last time she felt like that was with Kaidan, and that brought on a whole different set of problems. She _hoped_ he wouldn't hurt her like Kaidan had, but it still made her hesitant.

“Yeah, that.” He said, his brow arching slightly. 

“Well you weren't exactly complaining, James.” She said and he shrugged.

“I wasn’t expecting it, so I didn’t exactly bring my A-Game.” He said and she gave a short laugh.

“What exactly is your A-Game?” She asked and he moved closer to her, hand holding her shoulder. Head tilting to the side, he looked over her face again before gently brushing his lips against hers. With a low sound, he claimed her mouth with an intensity that made her heart skip a beat, his lips moving against hers hotly as he pulled her closer, almost into his lap. Her hands grasped at his shirt, his shoulders, anything to ground herself as his tongue slipped into her mouth, driving away any and all sensible thought.

She shivered as his hands slipped under her shirt, touching the skin of her waist and back and she cradled the back of his head when he broke the kiss, burying his face in her neck while he fought to catch his breath.

“Well that backfired.” He muttered and she snorted. With a roll of her eyes, she pushed him back, sitting in his lap astride his thighs. His hands wrapped around her hips, pulling her closer and a blush crept over her face at the feel of him hard and thick between her legs.

“Apparently it backfired a lot.” She said, her fingers curling into the back of the couch. His tongue skimmed over his lower lip as he looked up at her.

“Just give me a minute and I'll be good.” He said, hands sliding up to her back. “Though you aren't helping.”

“I'm sorry.”

“No, you're not.”

“You're right, I'm not.” She said and ran her fingers through his hair. “James, this doesn't have to be complicated if you don't want it to be. It can be just _this,_ ” she pressed down on him suggestively, his hands clenching on her back. “If you want.”

“That _not _what I want, Sarah.” James said, “I want you. To be with just you. The only man in your life, not some guy you have fun on the side.”__

__“I'm coming out of a pretty intense relationship. I care about him a lot, and he's very important to me.” Sarah said._ _

__“Why are you leaving him, then?”_ _

__“He's asked me to let him go.” She said, her fingers tracing idle figures through the short hair at the back of his head. “He kind of wants to meet you, actually.”_ _

__“Yeah?” James asked, not sure if he should be concerned at the fact that she and Thane (and he knew she was talking about Thane) had talked about him._ _

__“He just wants to know that I'm going to be happy.”_ _

__“I get that.” He said with a nod. “Thane Krios, right?”_ _

__“How did you--Garrus, Liara, or Joker?”_ _

__“I’m not going to rat them out.” James said, “They just thought I should know. Apparently it's pretty obvious to everyone there's something between us.”_ _

__“How much did this mystery person tell you?”_ _

__“Just that he's a Drell you got together with while you were taking down the Collectors.”_ _

__“Nothing else?”_ _

__“He's a pretty beast assassin, but that's about it.”_ _

__“That's all?”_ _

__“Yes, ma’am.” He said and she gave a sigh, looking away from him._ _

__“Okay.” She said, but he got the feeling she was holding something back. After a moment, she turned her attention back to him, a small smile pulling at her lips. Fingertips touched the side of his face gently as she leaned into him, her lips gently brushing against his in a featherlight kiss which he returned just as gently._ _

__“What is it that _you_ want, Sarah?” James asked as she pulled away._ _

__“You.” She said simply, “However you'll have me, I just want you.”_ _

__“You should know that when I do these things, I'm in it for the long haul.”_ _

__“I wouldn't mind a little stability in my life, I don't seem to have much of it anymore.” Sarah said and leaned into him again, arms hanging off the back of the couch as she pressed herself flush to his chest. The smile that he had when she kissed him was small, gentle, and happy._ _

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Comments are always lovely~!

**Author's Note:**

> Reviews are always lovely!


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